perfection...

why do i seek perfection in everything i do? why do i want my conversations to have a perfect ending? why do i want to talk about perfect topics which involve no clash and contradiction of opinions?
why is it necessary that everything has to be perfect all the time? ALL the time!?!?

am i being melodramatic, or intentionally depressing?
i am just tired. i dont like this entire activity of being here in US...:(
i have always done things which "feel right"..no matter how illogical.
and, somehow there is no feel good factor while i am here in US.. although they serve you dollars on a plate everyday!! :( somehow, i am not able to encash my smile for it..
thing is to realise, what matters to you most.
i know my answer, hence the big decision which rolled out of my mailbox this morning.

i got nothing to my name now.. only hopes and dreams.. :)
i am much better now.. and the situation - less imperfect!! :)

bckgrd -

"You stand before me
Now we stare eye to eye
Before another second clicks away, one of us will die
You reach for your metal as I reach for mine
The sound of bullets flying through the air is followed by a cry
And there cryin'

What will we do, what will we say when it’s the end of this game that we play
Will we crumble into the dust, my friend
Or will we start this game over again..."

Dangerous game -- 3 doors down..

/me -- =