And nothing else matters..

Pledge to be Veg for 30 days! :-)

2009-12-17T13:25:00.000+07:00

Global warming has been called humankind's "greatest challenge" and the world's most grave environmental threat, and science shows that one of the most effective ways to fight global warming is to go vegetarian.¹

Stars such as Sir Paul McCartney and Chrissie Hynde are lending their voices to share what science has already proven—that the meat industry is one of the leading sources of the greenhouse gases that lead to global warming.

When asked what personal change people could make to help the environment, McCartney replied, "I think the biggest change anyone could make in their own lifestyle would be to become vegetarian." To read the complete interview with Sir Paul McCartney, visit PETA's blog The PETA Files.

A 2006 United Nations report found that the meat industry produces more greenhouse gases than all the SUVs, cars, trucks, planes, and ships in the world combined.² Greenhouse gases cause global warming, which studies show will increasingly lead to catastrophic disasters—like droughts, floods, hurricanes, rising sea levels, and disease outbreaks—unless we drastically reduce the amounts emitted into the atmosphere.

Many conscientious people are trying to help reduce global warming by driving more fuel-efficient cars and using energy-saving light bulbs, but they could do more simply by going vegetarian.

The official handbook for the Live Earth concerts says that "refusing meat" is the "single most effective thing you can do to reduce your carbon footprint."³
According to Environmental Defense, if every American skipped one meal of chicken per week and substituted vegetarian foods instead, the carbon dioxide savings would be the same as taking more than a half-million cars off U.S. roads.
The University of Chicago reports that going vegan is 50% more effective than switching to a hybrid car in reducing greenhouse gas emissions.

More than Just CO₂

Raising animals for their flesh, eggs, and milk is one of the world's leading emitters of carbon dioxide (CO₂). But global warming is caused by more than just CO₂. Animal agriculture is the leading source of methane and nitrous oxide emissions, which—combined with carbon dioxide—causes the vast majority of global warming.

Methane: The billions of farmed animals crammed into factory farms produce enormous amounts of methane, both during digestion and from the acres of cesspools filled with feces that they excrete. Methane is more than 20 times as powerful as carbon dioxide at trapping heat in our atmosphere.⁵ Statistics from the Environmental Protection Agency show that animal agriculture is the number one source of methane emissions in the U.S.⁶
Nitrous Oxide: Nitrous oxide is about 300 times more potent as a global warming gas than carbon dioxide. According to the U.N., the meat, egg, and dairy industries account for a staggering 65 percent of worldwide nitrous oxide emissions.⁷

You Can Help Stop Global Warming Today

The most effective way to fight the global warming crisis is to stop eating meat, eggs, and dairy products. Start today by taking the Pledge To Be Veg for 30 Days.

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Don't you think it is our collective responsibility to take care of our planet..

Lets go veg for 30 days and make a difference!

After all, it's never too late to turn over a new leaf !! :)

~ Sugandh

--
"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, 'thank you,' that would suffice."
-- Meister Eckhart

My Last post here!

2009-10-01T16:57:00.004+07:00

So long!!
I have had avid readers all throughout..! You've read my stories.. and I am humbled with your attention and time..But now its time to move on! :)

I am now writing on http://thebrighterside.wordpress.com

The thing is, I am a new person now.. I am so completely changed (rather 'reformed') from what I used to be in this blog, that I am no longer able to associate myself with all these archives..:))
I used to be so depressed in life!! But something has changed my life.. Its a whole-new me, in a fresh new avatar!...

The something that changed my life is - "The Art of Living".. and the deep knowledge of my Guru - Sri Sri Ravishankar..
Ever after I joined the AOL, I am a much much happier person - thats what I feel, and thats what everyone around me has to say too! The problems in my life has not ceased to exist, but my perception towards them has changed..

So long,
thanks for being with me,
See you on the 'brighter side'!! :)
Love
Sugandh

Make the whole life a game!

2009-06-24T13:30:00.003+07:00

Make the whole life a game..!
- By Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

We want to find a reason for everything, a purpose for everything. We want to analyze and understand everything. People even try to understand their dreams. What is the use? Whatever dream you have had, so what? Whether you are sitting on horseback or on top of a train in your dream; whether you see a crow or a duck or a pigeon or swan or a mouse or a cat in your dream, what does it matter? Why do you waste so much time interpreting dreams, trying to know something about dreams? We call ourselves wise because we want to understand. We want to do something only if we get something out of it.

A fool is somebody who does something and doesn't get anything out of it. Their foolish acts, even those you can interpret into meaning and purpose, you see they do them without any purpose, without any meaning. Since childhood we have been told, "Don't be a fool." What is wrong with being a fool? What is wrong with standing alone, apart from the crowd? Let the crowd act however it wants. I stand apart from that. I act my way!

A fool is somebody who does something very unique, which is not accepted by others. All entertainment, including games, are foolish acts. Just think of a person from another planet, maybe Mars, comes here and sees a huge crowd watching a team of boys on this side and another team on that side, trying to fight for a ball and put it into a basket. It would appear absolutely funny! One ball in the middle, a team of boys here, trying to push it there, trying to push it that way. Why all this trouble? Why don't they just take the ball and put it in the basket? What difference does it make whether they put it in this basket or that basket? It is so foolish, playing soccer, playing basketball. For hours together other people sit there, howling and yelling and clapping. George Bernard Shaw said somewhere, "Cricket is a game where eleven fools play and eleven thousand watch." It is true. All games are foolish acts. A game is a game because it is foolish.
If you find meaning, purpose, aim and competition, you destroy the whole game. If you are not foolish in your life for some time if possible all the time, if not possible, at least some time-you miss your life. You miss the joy in life. If somebody calls you a fool, how do you act? Your eyes become red. You start grinding your teeth! However, it is a great compliment. You should wait for such a compliment because this is very difficult to get. People may feel that you are a fool and they often don't say it to you. If some people, with great courage, come and tell you that you are a fool, you should feel happy. The greatest problem for us is being a fool. We try not to be fool.

All our life we resist and fear arises in us. A fool is one who acts with freedom, who has all freedom, isn't it? That is how he could be a fool. If somebody has not experienced freedom, he cannot be a fool. Freedom is behind every fool. God loves you being a fool. He doesn't love wise men so much. He is bored of their philosophies. He is terribly bored by all the books written about Him.

Make the whole life a game! A game means there is no purpose, there is nothing. Just take it lightly, easily. Play the game. That is worship that is celebration. There is nothing that you do that will please God. There is nothing that you will do that will displease God. He is not waiting there with a staff, just waiting for you to do a mistake so He can punish you. Don?t have such cruel picture of God as someone who is judging, who is going to punish you if you do this or that. If He doesn't want you to do something, you can never do it. It is impossible. The very fact that He has allowed you so much freedom to do anything you like, means He says, Don't take anything seriously, it is all a game. It's all like a dream!

Hows the weather guys :)

2009-05-29T15:23:00.001+07:00

Okay.. Am just setting up the mobile blogging stuff.. Dont even
vaguely expect that i am going to blog something meaningful now.. :)

--
"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, 'thank you,' that
would suffice."
-- Meister Eckhart

2009-01-07T14:06:00.002+07:00

During a break at the plant where I'm employed, I walked by a friend who works with computers. He was sitting at his desk with his feet propped up, staring straight ahead as if in a trance. When he didn't stir as I passed, I asked, "Are you all right?"

He blinked, smiled and said, "I'm on screensaver."

current mood -

2008-12-31T13:25:00.000+07:00

Xmas and my wishlist!

2008-12-24T17:19:00.005+07:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS, GUYS!!!! :)

I hope Santa reads my blog tonight and I hope I get ALLL OF IT!!!!!

Muhahahahahaha!!! :)

Crazy taxi!

2008-12-23T19:20:00.005+07:00

You know, I love this game on facebook called Crazy Taxi!! Its so damn addictive!
I love jumping over other cars and getting my way.. :)

There are so less no. of controls and not a very complicated game!...

I am the topmost among all my friends at a score of 55817.. but there are some geeks who have theirs at 206000 .. It amazes me how much of it have they played..

Basically the secret of winning in any video game, or better said, the secret of a rilly-rilly high score in a v-game is to be consistent and make NO mistakes! absolutely none!
and if you are lucky, you can actually get to that high score, unless ofcourse there is some pop up window which disturbs the screen.. or someone comes looking for you and wants an urgent answer to their 'hello? how are you"..
sigh.. it happened with me so many times, when i almost snapped at poor kinshuk.. :D

lol.. its nice.. i have had such addictions to a lot of games before this.. the biggest one being Tomb Raider!!! It was one helluva crazy time..! :)

However, i find these 'mission-oriented' games quite time consuming.. I like games that can get started in a jiffy.. and get over in a few minutes (unless it is your day to be at 206000!!)
they act like a little catalyst-cum-steroid to get you a break from work, and make your brain a lil more active :)

if you think about it, then video games are quite a thing to be invented! how cool could someone be to have come up with the idea of a v-game!!

a little googling tells me this about the first video game -

"A device called the Cathode-Ray Tube Amusement Device was patented in the United States by Thomas T. Goldsmith Jr. and Estle Ray Mann.[2] The patent was filed on January 25, 1947 and issued on December 14, 1948. It described using eight vacuum tubes to simulate a missile firing at a target and contains knobs to adjust the curve and speed of the missile. Because computer graphics could not be drawn electronically at the time, small targets were drawn on a simple overlay and placed on the screen."

all said and done, if you get a chance, you shud definitely try your hand at Crrrazy Taxi!
its sure to get you too, get that extra kick! :D

Optical Illusions !!

2008-12-19T15:45:00.007+07:00

If you stare at the following picture long enough,
you should see a giraffe...

Gotcha! But the rest of these optical illusions are on the level !! :-)

What are "illusions"?

Illusions trick us into perceiving something differently than it actually exists, so what we see does not correspond to physical reality. Hence, the word illusion comes from the Latin verb illudere meaning, "to mock." In addition, some illusions show us one thing in a picture, while someone else sees something entirely different in the same picture.

Research scientists must be sure that the results of their work are not "illusory" in nature. They need to accurately report what "is", rather than their general "impression" of "what is". So many times a scientist will repeat an experiment many times, or in different laboratories, to ensure that their results were valid. Science is only "good science" when anyone can repeat the experiment and get the same results.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If your eyes follow the movement of the rotating pink dot,
the dots will remain only one color, pink.

However if you stare at the black " +" in the center, the moving dots turns to green.

Now, concentrate on the black " + " in the center of the picture. After a short period, all the pink dots will slowly disappear, and you will only see only a single green dot rotating.

It's amazing how our brain works. There really is no green dot, and the pink ones really don't disappear. This should be proof enough, we don't always see what we think we see.

Now let's play with some words...what do you see below?

In black you can read the word GOOD;
but the word EVIL also appears in white letters inside each black letter.

Now what do you see?

You may not see it at first, but the white spaces create the word OPTICAL,
while the blue landscape spells out ILLUSION.

And what do you see below?

This one is quite tricky! The word TEACH reflects as LEARN.

Last one of these -- what do you see?

You probably read the word ME in brown, but.......
when you look through ME
you will see YOU!
Do you need to look again?

The Man in the Coffee Beans

The "illusion" is that this is just a picture of coffee beans; but it is not. Can you find a man's face among the beans? Some say that if you find the man in 3 seconds or less, the right half of your brain may be more well developed than most.

PS: This is not a trick. A man's face is really hidden among the beans.

The following picture is NOT animated.

Your eyes are making them move. To test this, stare at one spot in each picture for a few seconds and everything will stop moving; OR look at the black center of each circle in the first picture, and it will stop moving; but when you move your eyes to the next black center, the previous one will move after you take your eyes away from it.

Check this out...!!

Do you see the horizontal lines as sloping or straight?

Ans. - All of the lines are straight !
The misaligned black and white blocks fool your brain into thinking that the lines are sloping.

.. We don't always see, what we think we are seeing!! :)

(Courtesy : Internet)

To fast and too fast!! :D

2008-10-06T14:59:00.004+07:00

Today I'm fasting!
And guess wht, I've a bigger lunch box today than otherwise.. It has all these fast-friendly snacks, or so to say..
I've a very specific reason for fasting today.. I'm practising for Oct 18th! :) keep guessing!! I'm so excited!! :)
As usual, this great activity of mine, invited an uninterrupted discussion on the dinner table yesterday.. where dad suggested that I should be going for a medical advice before I fast.. while mom's idea was to go for a mock fast, (wherein I pretend like I'm fasting, but instead, I'm just eating a different type of food).. :D Kinshuk was quite clear that he didn't really want a long life at the risk of losing his wife.. :D and so I needn't fast!!

LOL.. I love these elaborate discussions when it comes to me.. he he..

Today, after a long time,almost one & a half months, I came in to office by the office bus.. In between, I came in either with the driver or worked from home.. And so this interesting thing happens..
I was standing on the bus stop.. and I see this guy who goes in the same bus as me.. crossing the road to get to my side of the road..where the bus comes..
Now, I've never ever spoken to this chap, I dont even know his name.. oh wait. may be Vaibhav or Saurabh.. or one of those common north indian names.. :D I'm not sure.. :D

So, he saw me from a distance.. and waved!
Err!! What? Why is he waving at me..!? The bus wasn't here as yet, and there was no point trying to signal for the bus to stop..
I tried to remember, if I'd heard someone say he was squint or sthing..

No ideA!

He was still waving enthusiastically! And was jumping between cars and trucks on the SO busy Mehrauli-badarpur road, constantly looking in my direction!!

I almost shivered..! I had done NOTHING to harm this guy.. we were unrelated. It was totally crazy for him to even 'want' to wave at me in the middle of the road, in early morning hours.

My mind was running in all directions frantically, as he was approaching towards me, with his laptop bag in one hand, and a lunch box in the other, and his IBM badge hanging round his neck and swinging like a pendulum with every step he took to come closer towards me..

COuld he be running towards me to show me how fast he cud run..?
Was he surprised to see me after a long time..?
Wa he trying to create his presence?!
Hey wait.. COuld he be doing a 'mock wave'.. in order to fool the cars rushing on the road, about his urgency to cross the road?!

By this time, I'd run out of ideas, and he had finally managed to cross the road and gasping.. almost in half breath said a 'Hi' !!

A "hi" ..!? Is that all!? I was furious - he made my mind work so much right in the morning, for no good!

I tried to stay calm and 'tried' to smile and said "hi.. whats up.? You almost died out there amidst those cars!"..

He gave me a demeaning look.. huh?
And then said, "You dont know! The bus stop has changed from here to the next signal.. And I was waving at you so that you could look in my direction and I could signal this to you.. But you seemed lost.. so I had to rush in to this side of the road, and tell you this. I dont have your no. too.. Could you pass me your cell no. ?

Ah!! Convenient!
All in one go!! This man, was not even smart, he was also a scheming bus-mate who could trick you into disclosing personal information in the air..

I pretended to feel sorry, and told him that I had come in after a long time, and that I was in Bangalore for 20 days.. I dont even understand, why there was the need to explain anything to him..! I smartly skipped the cell phone no. part.. :) lol..
He started walking, and I silently walked besides him.. There were still 5 mins for the bus to come..

"So, you stay in the K block right?", he said.
"Yeah.. (smiling), how do you know.. ? " - I'm always so curious about the why's and how's!

"No, I just saw you a couple of times near the K block gate.. I stay in the opposite colony.. ". -He.
"Oh.. ok.. ", -me.
"Whats your name again..? - me.

He smiled at this. Frankly, I was not interested in asking this question, but to hell with whoever invented the concept of "polite conversation".. :D

He held up his IBM tag up in the air to show me his full name and employee number. I swear, he looked so demented doing that thing, I almost giggled! :D
And funnily, his fingers hid his first name and only showed the "Gupta" which followed..

I smiled and said, I am Sugandh.

Ah,. the bus came at this moment.. and I jumped on to grab the window seat. :)
Mr Gupta made it a point to say "See you" like an idiot when he crossed me..

LOL!! I'm dying to narrate this to Kinshuk when I get home.. :) I'm sure he'll have some xpert comments to save the men-breed! :D

Current mood -

Navaratris!! :)

2008-10-04T20:14:00.004+07:00

On Navaratri

‘Nava’ means nine. It also means ‘fresh’ or ‘new’. ‘Ratri’,‘ra’ means giving solace or rest. ‘Tri’ means three. There are three types of botherations or problems that may affect a person - physical, mental, spiritual. That which gives you relief from all these difficulties is ‘ratri’. ‘Ratri’ or night relieves you and brings you comfort. It takes you into its arms and puts you to sleep. Even birds and animals go to sleep at night. The night relaxes everybody, whether happy, unhappy or miserable, everybody goes to sleep.
‘Navaratri’ means the new night or the nine nights that give you rest from all these three types of problems.

The nine days represent the nine months spent by the baby in the mother’s womb. It represents the evolution of the consciousness to a heightened awareness.

In life, there are positive and negative qualities that affect us. Navaratri represents how the negativity can be conquered by the inherent positive qualities in an individual so that one emerges as a divine being.

In the ashram, when such a celebration happens, it is done for the benefit of all of humanity. It is done with an intention that all the people should be happy; there should be good rainfall, prosperity in the country and so on. Many 'homas' are conducted with the chanting of 'mantras' creating an atmosphere of positivity and celebration.

'Mantras' remove fear from the mind. They break the thread of repetitive thoughts and bring the mind to the present moment, which is the field of all possibilities. The sound energy of the mantras charges the atoms positively. These vibrations are absorbed by every atom of our body.

'Homas' are ancient ways of purifying the individual and collective consciousness. They have three aspect; Devapuja -honoring the divine in all its forms, Sangatikarana -hastening the process of evolution by bringing together the elements of creation and Dana -sharing what you have been blessed with.

Women are celebrated during these days. In the Hindu mythology, the three deities Durga, Lakshmi and Saraswati representing courage, wealth and wisdom are celebrated.

~~~

So long.. haven't really found the time to write in..

You know, after a long time I again went for the Navratri Special Advanced course here in Delhi...
And as it happens everytime, it was amazing! with a capital A!!! :)

All the silence.. all the meditations.. all the knowledge.. it is something that your soul craves for every minute.. I'm so glad it happened! :)

Isn't it true that many times in life, we're stuck with such unimportant things, that we lose sight of the significant.
I seldom think..How important is career in life?
How important is family?
More so, how important is the balance?

There're ofcourse no definite answers to this..
For me its always been a simple choice.. Whatever takes me towards love, I always choose that. Whatever takes me to that innermost bliss, its so obviously the best choice! :)
Guruji says, that the choice is always between 'good' and 'better'.. Its never between 'good' and 'bad'...:D .. and that while making decisions, we should always opt for long-term joy and short-term misery! rather than short-term joy and long-term misery.. :)

Nice ha.. :)

2008-09-10T13:18:00.003+07:00

So i am here today.. trying to find out whats it that i wish..
i slept over most of the things that were troubling me yesterday.. and woke up feeling so good! :)

Sudarshan Kriya does it. It takes away all the crap from your head and gives you a head wash :D.. literally!

X is such a lively person.. I'm beginning to truly admire his enthusiasm and spirit. He is so focused yet so cheerful. He is serious when he wants to be, and can say the most stupid thing in the world when he is up to joking..
He has the looks to die for, and a personality to envy!

He's put pictures of his baby girl as a screen saver on his laptop.. and he praises how good his wife cooks.

I'm so glad to have someone like him around, all day. Who simplifies things for you by simply - yes, 'staying in the moment and focusing on the abundance'.. Haven't I heard this KP a hundred times before?

I have, perhaps I just don't know how to implement it. ;) wink..

Was reading this article on the internet today morning.. and it said, its good to speak out your hidden wishes once in a while.. so as to be aware what is it thats in your mind! :D Funny.. but I'm gonna give it a try.. So the next 5 mins, I am going to be completely illogical.. and just scribble down whatever is on my mind right now.. :) and Promise I'll hit the Publish button when I'm done.. without re-reading what I wrote!! :)

I wish :-

1. I wish Mom didn't have to go to work in this age.. I wish my mom had a son..
2. I wish I had the best of both worlds - have the entire Bangalore scenario shift to Delhi. I mean, a want a family life like Delhi.. and an office life like Bangalore.!
3. I wish I could travel with Guruji all over the world for one month.. I wish I could cook his food. wash his clothes, pack his bag, carry his luggage.. wash his feet... I wish.. I wish..
4. I wish there wasn't so much traffic in Delhi, so Kinshuk could come home sooner.

:)

2008-08-13T13:30:00.003+07:00

For sometime now, I am thinking of giving my blog a new look.. I tried a couple of blog templates.. and the one which struck me, needs a lot of html editing.. and as usual, I havent had sufficient time to sit at it. sigh!

Today - is the day!! I am going to do it, for sure! :)

Kinshuk is gone to Bangalore today.. His ticket got upgraded to Kingfisher business class, and man!! WAS I JEALOUS!?!!? ! He was obviously excited.. and all I told him was - to feel guilty about enjoying it alone.. :D

And so, one person gets to travel across the country in this 'oh-so-lovely' weather.. gets to travel in the best domestic flight... gets to stay in the ashram for 5 days.. and to top it all, gets to meet Guruji!!!!! And the other one ofcourse likes to sit by the window overlooking the lush green garden.. seeing the rain-drops falling .. and 'working' from home for the never-ending Synopsys cores tech change! :)
Ah, talk about 'life is fair enough'..!! :)

Mom's unwell today.. and hence I have the herculean task of managing home and office all together.. It is tiring, definitely.. but I enjoy it.. :)
There's so much to learn even in the art of managing a house.. I definitely feel, all housewives have more common sense and managerial abilities, that can be put together in a 5 year MBA course! I see mom calculating numbers with the speed of light.. she remembers most things without any "To-do" lists... or "Memos" on the phone.. she knows exactly what to do when and how! and the most amazing thing is, that she still finds time for her regular yoga and meditation.. and is smiling all day, regardless of any stress or fatigue!!
To put it simple, for me, she is a Superwoman! :) And I am really in deep awe of her! :)

And now, if I want to save time for the blog html stuff.. I should stop writing here, and get on to it..

more later! :)

current mood -

2008-08-07T15:00:00.005+07:00

Heylo!! So its time that I come out of my cocoon.. and start doing some justice to my little blog, which kept me company, when I was not this busy! :)

Have a very occupying weekend coming ahead.. looking fwd to it though!

The thing I am most excited about today, is what Laina told me on the phone this morning!! :) It completely made my day!
It is true... something just sank in..

This is what I smsed to her -

"This is really exciting! :) Its unreal, how everything which is meant to be, happens just so effortlessly.. :)"

true to every word!
So many times, we "try" to do something.. rather than "letting it happen"..
Whenever something happens in "sehejata" .. that's the only way it should happen..! :)
When we force it.. or brood over ways to make it occur, its probably not the right way for it to be! :) So I think! :)

Looking back.. in my life, most of the things gone by, have happened in the most effortless manner.. with me just looking at it happening!

I am sure its the same with most people..
Its all about, do we really trust what the nature wants for us!? ;)

Current mood -

What keeps me busy.. :)

2008-05-16T16:14:00.005+07:00

So it is.. I have a lot of work to do today.. and suddenly there is this disturbing urge to eat biriyani.
Thanks to Roshith and his picturesque description of his visit to Hyderabadi Biriyani in Bangalore. I hate him. :(

Messaged Ketan to ask him if he would come along tonight for a biriyani treat. He has so far expressed a decent amount of interest, but I am not sure.
Kinshuk is coming late from office tonight. (Or so I think. Unless he has really given in to my hue & cry on phone just now!)
Dad wont go, coz he wont drive in the night.. and Mom wont go coz dad wont go.

Oh man! talk about dependencies and complications.

I have to eat biriyani, and that is it.

And no!
Please dont ask me to cook it. Thats mom's ever-ready solution to all my food-related problems. Cook it yourself.

No no no.

Ok, let me change the topic, so that I could save my little mind from the greedy desires that're clawing in.

So whats keeping me busy?

The office, the travelling, and AOL.
Gurgaon office is nice.. except the ever ogling north indian boys! Incidentally, the day I came to this office, the floor, where I got a seat, was vacated.
So there are just 2-3 vague people sitting in different corners on my floor.. and the office looks like my private villa... . with a private bathroom.. and a private coffee shop.. lol..

Life is great! :)

The birthday... :)

2008-05-14T15:14:00.008+07:00

Happy Birthday to Guruji!!! :)
It was His birthday yesterday.. and I baked a cake.. It was a muffin bake actually.. banana pecans(replaced by walnuts) cake.. a no sugar, no eggs cake.. got the recipe from here ! :)

turned out ok.. atleast kinshuk and me liked it! :) dad hated it, and mom was in a contemplative state till end, thinking if it might get better after it cooled down a bit! lol..
I enjoyed baking it.. and thats what matters at the end.. :)

went for satsang in the evening, after hurriedly finishing my conf call.. mom and me had to walk our way through, coz dad refused to drive us down.. lol.. he likes to water the plants in the garden more than us, I guess! :)

kinshuk and me kept talking late night.. about so many things.. and slept off with the usual 'should-we-turn-off-the-AC-or-not' dilemma! :D

I like my days!! They are so busy... and I am always looking fwd to going back home.. and then looking fwd to come to office again.. and then looking fwd for weekends,,. I can feel so much thrill, God knows why! :)

I just love my life! :) Every moment is so beautiful.. :)

There was a major thunderstorm today morning.. followed by rains :) Had it been Bangalore, I could have tken a chance of walking down home and getting drenched on the way..
In here, my office is located on a Highway.. and there's no chance I cud do that! I wish it rains in the evening.. and I can get wet!!!
I wish, I wish, I wish!!!

keep faith!
bckgrnd music - Lost in love - Air Sup-lie~!

Smiling again!

2008-05-05T18:29:00.003+07:00

Last week, I decided to give myself a gift :)
And click click click; I ordered a Lara Croft Tomb Raider CD from ebay! :) Yippee! Have I disclosed as yet, how much I love that game?!
Back home a few years back, I was addited to it. I used to play it for 14-15 hours a day! Not eating, not sleeping, not doing anything else but trying to find the ways in the game. It was definitely fun! :)

Yesterday, when the courier boy handed me the packet, it was last when my folks saw me ;)

I involved Kinshuk too in the vicious game. We were at it till 1 in the night.. and then had to force ourselves to sleep and not bother about the lost key!! lol..
And today, I cant wait to get back home so that I could play it again..

My new cellphone wallpaper has Lara Croft looking on at a distant object..My new orkut profile pic has Lara Croft holding on guns and looking back.

I think I am obsessed.

bckgrnd music - Hinder - Lips of an angel

current mood -

2008-03-27T15:45:00.000+07:00

Yawn Yawn.. yawwwwwwn..
Is it time to wake up, already?!

lizard-o-phobia!

2007-09-18T03:44:00.000+07:00

Alright!
Now its a very very critical situation! As I am sitting in my room and typing this thing out.. right behind me - is the most horrendous creature on this earth.

A lizard.

I am so bloody scared right now, cant tell you!! My hands are shaking as I type this. I am just inherently scared of lizards, and they bloody know it! thats why she is moving from one wall to another.. hurriedly jumping across doors and windows.. and my heart misses a beat everytime she goes a lil off-balance!! I feel she'll fall! :(

I have been watching her for the past 2 hours (in the middle of the damn night!).. waiting for her to settle down or go to sleep!! But seems, she just doesnt know what she wants to do! Sad!! duh.

What the hell!! I cant even go to some other room and sleep.. coz there IS no other room!
I cant sleep on my bed.. coz its on the floor.. and if she falls on the floor and decides to crawl her way up to the wall through my bed -- I'll be dead.
I cant walk around, coz she might get startled by the sudden action, and might fall on me.

Damn! why am i so scared. :( I just cannot get myself to act normally right now!!

Ok Sugandh, Relax. Take a deep breath. Know that she is just a lizard. A tiny sweet little lizard. She is very lovable. She has vacuum pads (or watever you call it) in her feet, which let her have a grip on the walls. So come wat may, she will not fall.

Ok seee!!! SEE!!!! I told ya!!!!!!!
She just fell down, right behind my chair!!!! MY CHAIR!!
WHAT IF SHE'D FALLEN ON MY HEAD!!?!?!
GOD, SAVE ME!! :(

I think I am going to have a heart attack. :(

To make myself feel better and also to get distracted, I just chatted with my US colleague -

Sugandh: steve
2:12AM: Steven Duffield: ya?
2:12AM: Sugandh: are there lizards in the States?
2:12AM: Steven Duffield: yes, why?
2:12AM: Sugandh: i mean domestic lizards..
2:12AM: Steven Duffield: uhm, whatcha mean?
2:12AM: Sugandh: you know, those ones on the house walls?
2:13AM: Sugandh: No?
2:13AM: Steven Duffield: I think so.
2:13AM: Sugandh: Hmm
2:13AM: Steven Duffield: Why?
2:13AM: Steven Duffield: (In Texas, etc)
2:13AM: Sugandh: There is one in my room right now.. and she is just gaping at me right from the wall above,
2:13AM: Sugandh: and i am dead scared :-(
2:14AM: Steven Duffield: Most of the lizards here are not bad ones (I don't think)
2:14AM: Sugandh: lol
2:14AM: Steven Duffield: I'll be right there to save you :-)

Ok, I am gonna hit 'Publish' here, and then turn around to see where she is and what she's doing. Please pray for me.

2007-09-15T02:32:00.000+07:00

hmm.. i am not feeling great right now. dont ask why! :(
sometimes i feel weird, when i get to know too much about myself, and what all is wrong with me, and what all needs to be implemented!!..
yeah , ultimately its all for my growth.. but is it wrong to expect people to talk sweetly to you? Is it too much of a desire, or too much of a feverish yearning!?
isnt there a way through politeness?
is euphemism so unpopular?!!

huh.
i just want to sleep right now.. and wake up in the morning when all this junk is flushed out of my mind.

amen.

my footprint :)

2007-09-12T16:38:00.000+07:00

woohoo! been long.. :)
Am doing this amazing course called Yes!+. Its just an outstanding experience!! :).. Started on Monday and will go on till Sunday. :)

Being in Delhi is so much fun.. coz its like the central hub of so many AOL activities :)
(I need to pat my back sometime. )

As a part of an exercise yesterday, we were asked to calculate our ecological footprint!

In a pretty interesting way, mine turned out to be 1.1.. :)
Then I decided to check out my footprint when I was in Bangalore.. And it turned out to be 2.9..

I'm so glad I made an eco-friendly decision in life :) lol..

PS - You can calculate yours - HERE!

oh these festivals..!

2007-08-29T19:20:00.000+07:00

It was Raksha Bandhan yesterday.. and I was lured into a devious scheme by my folks to come home for the same!
Actually, to think about it.. I havent been home for any of these festive occasions for so long now.. nearly 6-7 years..
After finishing school.. I went to pilani.. and then straight to Bangalore.. And neither have I been those 'lets-go-home-every-month' type of a girl.. so all those Holis.. Diwalis.. Dussheras..Rakhis.. janamashtmis... New Years... passed by.. and I stood watching.

This time it was difficult.

Since I have the work-remote option from office, I couldnt even deny on the pretext of work. So I was instructed in strict words by Mom, to book my tickets and come home. In return, I was promised an uninterrupted broadband internet connexion.

Yeah right.

It was a mess. The internet connexion refused to work on the first day, I had a project release the next day, and I had no idea how I was going to explain about my state of no-work !!

It did work later, but the most interesting part of the incident was that I saw myself getting angry. Really really angry! - After a long time :)

I'm trying to put the pictures of the rakhi thing here.. but for some reason, this stupid blogger aint working.. so, I am gonna do this later!

duh.

Know yourself. And you know it all! :)

2007-08-21T18:52:00.000+07:00

Yeah sure! Its a new life! New, new, new!! And different!!
This Delhi thing, as I would call it - was surely a fork in the road :)

I came here with just one small bag.

When I was packing all my stuff back in Bangalore and couriering it home, I had to end up living in a totally empty room for the last two days .
Those days were revealing. I had nothing to my name.
Suddenly I could feel that, the "I" and the "mine" were dropped. What was it that belonged to me!?

My furniture? Which I bought with utmost affection?
It was all sold.

My posters, paintings, books? Those that I've been buying over the years?
They found comfort with some friends and the rest preferred to be dumped in a carton box so that they are out of my way for sometime.

My clothes, cosmetics, accessories?
Some of them felt really old and so they moved on to become dusting clothes. Some of them found solace with Akshara Foundation.

The idea stayed.
What is it that is 'mine' ? What is it that I 'always' have with me? Leave apart everything else, this very body will leave me one day...

As we were driving down for a late night coffee in Delhi, I shared my thought with Kinshuk. And he started telling me a beautiful story...

There was once a king who had four queens.
Out of them, the king loved the youngest queen the most. He would really take care of her, pamper her and get her all that she would wish for..

Then there was the third queen, who was very beautiful. And it was this queen that the king would take out for dinner parties and public gatherings, where he could show off his pretty wife.

The second queen, according to the king was the wisest among all, and hence, in the times of distress and trouble, he would seek only her advice. He would even take her opinion in all the important matters.

Lastly it was the eldest queen - whom he would totally ignore all the time and would never even care for her. It was as if, she didnt exist for him.

...the story had a pause at this moment. We were parking the car now. We headed for a beautiful quiet walk through a boulevard strip before we could reach the cafe..

As we walked, he continued with the story...

Now one day, the king fell ill and the doctors declared that he wouldnt survive now.
The king sent out orders for the four queens to come and meet him on his death bed.

He then asked the youngest queen, if she would come with him, now when he is dying..
The queen said - "no, i cant come with you. " She walked off.

He turned to the third queen, and asked the same question.
The third queen said - " why would i come with you, i'd rather marry someone else". She walked off too.

The king repeated the question to the second queen, who said -
"i can accompany you till the grave, but not beyond that".

The dejected king looked at the eldest queen, and asked her the same thing, to which she smiled and said - "ofcourse i will come with you. "

... By this time, we had approached the door of the cafe and had taken a U-turn to take another round of walk..

I was eagerly waiting for Kinshuk to complete the story.. but he seemed to be lost in his own thought.
After a while, he looked at me, and asked my interpretation of the story..

"Is it over?" - I chirped.

"Yeah" - came the short and crisp reply.

"Well, I didnt really get the analogy in the story, if any."

To this he replied - "The youngest queen is your body. You take care of it so much, love it.. pamper it. But when you die - it leaves you.
The third queen is all your material possessions. You have them for show-off. But they too, will not come with you, when you die.
The second queen is your family and friends. You think they are the most important in your life.. but they too dont go with you when you leave this body..
The eldest queen is your Self. Your Soul. It stays with you and it goes with you. And this is the one whom you ignore the most - all your life!

Bring the attention back to yourself - to deep inside of you. Meditate. Know yourself. Know that this body is not yours, this car, this house, this family, friends -- nothing is yours.

.... We never opened the door of the cafe. We headed back home after taking an hour's walk..

:-)

good morninnnnnnnnnng delhi! :)

2007-08-02T11:48:00.000+07:00

So its fun!! I am here in the good ol' Capital!
Its nice.. am settling down gradually.. finding my ways in the big city.. I must get a car soon, else I will be dead in the heat of the city even before I'l realise!
No, really! Its so hot, I almost feel I shud be walking around with ice cubes on my head! :D

Everything is beginning to move towards perfection. Yeah, almost everything :)
Reminds me of this awesome song - ' I hear this life is overrated.. but I hope it gets better as we go'/... :) hehe..

One very noticeable thing which I felt as soon as I woke up to the Delhi reality is - that here everyone begins to talk in Hindi by default !! Not that its a problem for me, given my Hindi roots (as Suraj wud call it! ).. but yeah.. this is something unlike Bangalore :)

Just yesterday, I went in to this really hi-fi showroom..and asked this guy if he would show me the latest airtel connexion schemes.. This chap who was all dressed up in a sophisticated fashion, looked impressive and all..and looked like all British English wud flow from his mouth..
just smiled pleasantly and said - ' haaan haan.. aaiye aaiye.. hamare yahan sab mil jaayega" in the most rustic fashion!!
I had nothing to say, but just - 'achha,, dikhaiye'... lol..lol.. :))

Although shifting to a different city is always accompanied with some memories.. regrets.. excitement.. fun.. guilt.. doubts.. etc! But so far its pretty neutral for me! It just looks like it was always meant to be! And I am feeling very natural abt this whole deal..

Lets see whats on plate next :)

2007-07-26T18:03:00.000+07:00

The most unbelievable and vicious thing happened to me yesterday! :-\

Guess what! One AOL friend of mine, gifted me a saree as a parting gift!!!!!
My God! its the one and only proof of growing old!! :(

When he saw the startled look on my face after unwrapping the pack.. he began to explain that how a saree makes an Indian woman look pretty and all tht.

It might be right.. but I am just a little more than dismayed to see my smooth transition from a happy-go-lucky 'girl' to a sophisticated 'woman'....

I tell ya, it feels weird :(

all fun :)

2007-07-24T15:36:00.000+07:00

hmm.. so it is those last few days in Bangalore.. when you come back from office at 1 in the night..finishing up all work.. only to wake up in the morning remembering one "really-important-cant-leave-it-here" stuff - which you cannot cannot shove off/ neither squeeze into one of those carton boxes lying all over the room!!

.... And when you find yourself sitting in the team meeting and secretly scribbling on your notebook - the list of all the expenses you have to settle with your room mates.. and are caught doing it, when you reply "This month it is 1800" when your manager asks you the clock frequency at which you're running your design. LOL !! :))

... And when all the people around you suddenly start being really really nice to you.. and are really - genuinely - extremely interested in how much you've packed.. and will repeatedly ask you (almost every day!! sometimes twice a day) as to when you are leaving.. and what time is your flight.. followed by -- 'Ohhh.. We'll miss you here.. " ..
Lol.. Oh man! Talk about vanity! :))

And when you'll be incessantly reminded that you were a great person to hang around with.. and that you were the most enthusiastic character to work with in office !! Suddenly you'll be insinuated about all of your best qualities -- your zeal.. your companionship.. your jokes.. your honesty.. and what not! It almost would look like they were distributed free copies of thesaurus!!

Strange as it is, but you will be made to feel like there has been no one else better than you!! And there'll be none born of the same denomination, in a long long time to come!!
hahahhaha.. I am laughing my ass off right now, as I'm scribbling this post!!
Isnt it funny to watch people do their thing :)

2007-07-19T13:41:00.000+07:00

The President of India DR. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam 's Speech in Hyderabad

Why is the media here so negative?

Why are we in India so embarrassed to recognize our own strengths, our achievements? We are such a great nation. We have so many amazing success stories but we refuse to acknowledge them. Why?

We are the first in milk production.
We are number one in Remote sensing satellites.
We are the second largest producer of wheat.
We are the second largest producer of rice.

Look at Dr. Sudarshan, he has transferred the tribal village into a self-sustaining, self-driving unit. There are millions of such achievements but our media is only obsessed in the bad news and failures and disasters. I was in Tel Aviv once and I was reading the Israeli newspaper. It was the day after a lot of attacks and bombardments and deaths had taken place. The Hamas had struck. But the front page of the newspaper had the picture of a Jewish gentleman who in five years had transformed his desert into an orchid and a granary. It was this inspiring picture that everyone woke up to. The gory details of killings, bombardments, deaths, were inside in the newspaper, buried among other news.

In India we only read about death, sickness, terrorism, crime. Why are we so NEGATIVE? Another question: Why are we, as a nation so obsessed with foreign things? We want foreign T. Vs, we want foreign shirts. We want foreign
technology.

Why this obsession with everything imported. Do we not realize that self-respect comes with self-reliance? I was in Hyderabad giving this lecture,when a 14 year old girl asked me for my autograph. I asked her what her goal in life is. She replied: I want to live in a developed India. For her, you and I will have to build this developed India. You must proclaim. India is not an under-developed nation; it is a highly developed nation. Do you have 10 minutes? Allow me to come back with a vengeance. Got 10 minutes for your country? If yes, then read; otherwise, choice is yours.

YOU say that our government is inefficient.
YOU say that our laws are too old.
YOU say that the municipality does not pick up the garbage.
YOU say that the phones don't work, the railways are a joke,

The airline is the worst in the world, mails never reach their destination. YOU say that our country has been fed to the dogs and is the absolute pits. YOU say, say and say. What do YOU do about it?

Take a person on his way to Singapore . Give him a name - YOURS. Give him a face - YOURS. YOU walk out of the airport and you are at your International best. In Singapore you don't throw cigarette butts on the roads or eat in the stores. YOU are as proud of their Underground links as they are. You pay $5 (approx. Rs. 60) to drive through Orchard Road (equivalent of Mahim Causeway or Pedder Road) between 5 PM and 8 PM. YOU come back to the parking lot to punch your parking ticket if you have over stayed in a restaurant or a shopping mall irrespective of your status identity... In Singapore you don't say anything, DO YOU? YOU wouldn't dare to eat in public during Ramadan, in Dubai . YOU would not dare to go out without your head covered in Jeddah. YOU would not dare to buy an employee of the telephone exchange in London at 10 pounds ( Rs.650) a month to, 'see to it that my STD and ISD
calls are billed to someone else.'YOU would not dare to speed beyond 55 mph (88 km/h) in Washington and then tell the traffic cop, 'Jaanta hai main kaun hoon (Do you know who I am?). I am so and so's son. Take your two bucks and get lost.' YOU wouldn't chuck an empty coconut shell anywhere other than the garbage pail on the beaches in Australia and New Zealand.

Why don't YOU spit Paan on the streets of Tokyo? Why don't YOU use examination jockeys or buy fake certificates in Boston??? We are still talking of the same YOU. YOU who can respect and conform to a foreign system in other countries but cannot in your own. You who will throw papers and cigarettes on the road the moment you touch Indian ground. If you can be an involved and appreciative citizen in an alien country, why cannot you be the same here in India?

In America every dog owner has to clean up after his pet has done the job. Same in Japan. Will the Indian citizen do that here?' He's right. We go to the polls to choose a government and after that forfeit all responsibility. We sit back wanting to be pampered and expect the government to do everything for us whilst our contribution is totally negative. We expect the government to clean up but we are not going to stop chucking garbage all over the place nor are we going to stop to pick a up a stray piece of paper and throw it in the bin. We expect the railways to provide clean bathrooms but we are not going to learn the proper use of bathrooms.We want Indian Airlines and Air India to provide the best of food and toiletries but we are not going to stop pilfering at the least opportunity. This applies even to the staff that is known not to pass on the service to the public. When it comes to burning social issues like those related to women, dowry, girl child! and others, we make loud drawing room protestations and continue to do the reverse at home. Our excuse? 'It's the whole system which has to change, how will it matter if I alone forego my sons' rights to a dowry.' So who's going to change the system? What does a system consist of? Very conveniently for us it consists of our neighbours, other households, other cities, other communities and thegovernment. But definitely not me and YOU. When it comes to us actually making a positive contribution to the system we lock ourselves along with our families into a safe cocoon and look into the distance at countries far away and wait for a Mr. Clean to come along & work miracles for us with a majestic sweep of his hand or we leave the country and run away. Like lazy cowards hounded by our fears we run to America to bask in their glory and praise their system. When New York becomes insecure we run to England. When England experiences unemployment, we take the next flight out to the Gulf. When the Gulf is war struck, we demand to be rescued and brought home by the Indian government. Everybody is out to abuse and rape the country. Nobody thinks of feeding the system. Our conscience is mortgaged to money.

Thank you,

Dr. Abdul Kalaam

17 more days...:)

2007-07-12T12:46:00.000+07:00

ok, now!! so!! whats the news!!! :)
i am finally shifting from bangalore.. and moving to delhi... a much awaited activity!!
so many interesting things are on the plate.. that i am almost fainting to see that they are all coming true.. :) yay!

i am so excited!! just 17 more days to gooooooooooooooooooo :)

ok, btw, I gotta tell you about the most most romantic song on this earth.. It goes like..

"tere mere sapne.. ab ek rang hain...
jahan bhi le jaaye rahein.. ab hum sung hain..."

Get it here!!

On a high!!! :)

2007-07-09T13:44:00.000+07:00

Its been going great..
What? well, L-I-F-E !! :)

I am on such a high ! .. feel like jumping and touching the ceiling!! :)
yesterday went out picnic-ing with my AOL friends.. we went to this awesomely pictureseque place, a friend's house.. next to a lake.. we played games..did Gurupuja...meditation..followed by an awesome awesome satsang!!
we were a group of some 50-60 people.. and we simply rocked!! we sang and sang and sang..
towards the end.. almost all of us were in tears.. we were in such a state of ecstasy!! :)
The whole room was dancing.. jumping.. singing.. with all the instruments playing louder and louder.. and people going crazy.. :)
There was the guitar.. the keyboard.. the dholak.. the tabla.. and the othre add-ons!!

It was truly a marvelous fantastic day!! :)
I have jammed so many times with my friends.. over Gnr and metallica.. and floyd.. etc! but nothing compares to this!! nothing!
been to a pub and have been drunk and sloshed.. and had a high.. but nothing compared to the high I had yesterday!!
the kinda high you get when tears roll down your cheeks.. tears of fullness.. tears when you feel so uplifted from the bottom of your heart.. tears of gratefulness.. tears which celebrate life .. :)

I feel so so lucky.. :)
Its like an intoxication!!

bckgrnd - "Flipsyde - Spun"
/me - "whoa!" !!!

'being happy'..as I see it..

2007-06-28T20:44:00.000+07:00

Ah.. I'll try to explain!!
As cheesecake comments -" i think its the ppl around u that matter more"..
-- well, I totally disagree with this one!

If it were the family that mattered most.. then all those staying in huge families would have always been very very happy.
If it were a boyfriend/girlfriend/or the sort - then all married or committed people would always have been very very happy..
If it were pleasant team mates/colleagues/friends around you.. then several people across the world... would be really really happy - no matter whtever else happened in life!!

All I mean is, that there is no "ideal set of people, situations and place" which would bring happiness in your life. Never!
There is no such thing as a 'perfect boyfriend/girlfriend' .. or a 'perfect job'.. or a 'perfect country/city'.

If I think.. that let this happen.. and then I'll be happy... Let that happen.. and then I will be happy.. - -trust me, I'm never gonna make it..

If you are content -- right NOW, right HERE.. sitting on this chair.. gazing at the computer screen.. reading this blog.. you need nothing else. Whatever you are today.. whatever you are doing right now.. this moment.. if you are happy doing that.. you have made it!

Being happy is a habit. It is a verb.

And you know how that can be achieved?

-- By being 100% in the moment! And by giving your 100% to whatever you are doing in the m-o-m-e-n-t !!
When your mind is not in the past, and not in the future.. it is happy!
Have you noticed it? When you're, lets say, at a game of chess/football/any computer game - you are completely in the game.. you're focussed.. you're in the m-o-m-e-n-t! And do you remember feeling any pain at that time? Do you remember feeling malice towards that mean friend who abused you last night? Do you remember in that moment, that you hate your neighbour!? Or that how much you love your mom? Or that you have deadline to meet next week..??

When you give your mind some rest, you are happy.
When you are not thinking, you are happy!

And when are you not thinking? When you are in the present moment!

:)

2007-06-20T19:25:00.000+07:00

If you cannot be happy in one place, you cannot be happy in any other place.
If you do not know how to row one boat, you will not be able to row any other boat.

-Sri Sri

:)

my day! :)

2007-06-17T17:30:00.000+07:00

after so long i am at home on a sunday! totally totally living it up!

having fun.. chatting online with old friends... listening to some real nice music.. reading a book.. and sipping hot coffee while sitting next to the balcony door.. and its prettily raining outside! :)

today is my day! with myself! :)

i decided to wear my prettiest skirt and matching new ear rings.. even though when i am not going out anywhere,.. and i am just so so happy!!

i think being by yourself is the best thing one can do to relax!! yay!

oh i love my day!! :) [and my new ear rings! ---->]

Poooooooone!

2007-06-14T16:01:00.000+07:00

yay!! i am going to pune!!
i am so excited! i'll meet up with shravan! man, its been long, I've been wanting to meet him for almost a decade now! (ok, the exaggeration is only for the sake of it. :D)

so its finally happening! i booked my tickets! and now its vroooooooooooom!

tada.. lalalllaaa... hohoho.... hmm,.. umm.. tada...lalalalllaa...

:)

2007-06-13T17:43:00.000+07:00

I gotta tell you this!
That if you take a soft loaf of Britannia white bread and put a thick layer of Amul Cheese Spread on it ---- it tastes YUMMY!!!!! :)
slurp slurp!!

all about boyfriends, hairstyles and yeah "upgrades"!!

2007-06-08T15:16:00.000+07:00

This morning, I was in a pretty unusually jovial mood.
Why I say 'unusually'.. coz I dont know whats gotten into me! I dont feel like talking to anyone for the past many days. I just literally, NEVER get off from my workstation.. and hang around.. (like I used to do before! .. Infact, thats ALL that I used to do before.. lol!!)

So, I hit off some simulation.. and thought I would jump around for sometme.
I started strolling.. and ended up being at this colleagues place.. who was fanatically typing something on her laptop... I stood for sometime.. pondering if I should disturb her.. when I noticed that she was using more 'backspace' than the actual keys! lol!
I realised she needed a break!! :)

me - 'hey! whats up!
she(getting startled, almost frowning) - arrey bas chal raha hai.. lots of work.. i have this project delivery next week.. and there was this last moment change in the specs.. Oh.. its all going to be so difficult.. and you know.. that xyz person had to go on leave just THIS week! he is such an irresponsible person. I have to do extra work now.. blah blah... blah blah..

[You know, this is SO typical. You just walk up to any IT professional, anywhere in the world, and he/she will have "exactly same words" - every single day of the year!! darn the IT world! Sucks the creativity out of human mind! lol..!! ]

me - hmm.. i understand.. it must be tough.. anyways, you carry on.
I began to go, when she literally jumped out of her seat, in an almost non-understandable awe!!

she - heyy wait wait sugandh! you look different today!

me(getting conscious of my torn out kurta.. and weary chappals) - Oh! is it?! not really..

she (looking at me closely.. with squinting eyes) - No, I bet something is very prominently different in you today.. oh yeah..... I see now! You washed your hair!

me(taken aback!) - What!!! I dont think I wash my hair like once a month or so.. that it would be so apparent!!! Comon.. you break my heart!! lol..:))

she(ignoring my whining) -- Oh!!! I know why! You'll be meeting Kinshuk over the weekend.. right?

me (??%W$%#$???) - eh?! yeah, I will.. But whats that gotta do with my washing the hair.. ??

she(with a sly smile, and getting a bit irritated by my discordance) - Coz "generally" , girls like to flaunt by stylish hair, when they meet their boyfriends.

me - You sure need an upgrade girl! lol..:D

she - Oh! and I see that you havent straightened your hair today. Whats up? (winking)Going to the parlour, hmm?

me - whats gotten into you?! I am not doing anything special. Its just an ordinary day. and yeah, I didnt straighten the hair, coz I had to rush to office today morning.. and thr was no time!

[At this pointa time, I really stood straight and began to wonder, if it indeed was an ordinary day. And if I 'really' had taken any special measures to make myself look a little better than ordinary.]

she - Ah, dont gimme that! Comon man.. you gotta do something of your hair.. They are rough.. and uneven.. and look very unkempt..

me - (suprised at her change of tone) - haha.. I know it looks bad. But you know what, Kinshuk never notices it. So why waste money. (I tried to shift her focus from my weary hair. sigh!)

she - Oh! I bet he does! Just doesnt say anything. Iam telling ya, before marriage, I used to deck up so much for my husband(my bf then).. and even he used to suggest to me new hairstyles.. (i cud suddenly see her getting swept by nostalgia..)

me -- hmm.. how often do you wash your hair.. ? (trying to shift the focus back to the main topic)

she (ignoring my question) - See, I am telling ya, you shud go to some nice parlour and get something done to your hair.

me - hmm.

she - I gotta go now. have a meeting. talk to you on monday.

me - hmm. cya.

Now I am back at my seat.
me (thinking to myself - It is such a good decision not to talk to people. If only, I had stuck around at my place.. I would have escaped the brickbats about my hair. Huh. I dont think splurging huge amounts of money on hair stylists really does ne good. I dont agree. Huh. My hair looks good. I would straighten them on my own and it'll all be fine. Huh.).

Suddenly a firiend pings me on gtalk.

She - hey sugz! What plans for the weekend. There is this new parlour called 'Bounce'.. wanna check it out?
Me - hey.. why? anything special?
She - yeah! My boyfriend is coming over from Calcutta. :) blah blah...blah.. blah..blah..

The story continued.....

I think "I" need an upgrade!! lol!!! :))

me, movies and melancholy!

2007-05-30T15:34:00.000+07:00

Watched this movie called "Hazaron_Khwahishen_Aisi" yesterday..
it is such an awesome movie.. i kept crying towards the end.. This one was utterly realistic and so depresssing!
Ah! for that matter, I am the queen of crying-while-watching-movies :D I just find anything and everything , very touching and very carry-me-away types! Few share this trait with me.. and those who do.. ah.. I love them!.. :D
My mom is one great accomplice.. but sadly I havent had the chance to watch many movies with her of late..
then there was Neha in BITS.. we used to find even stupid movies like 'mujhse dosti karoge' very languishing... everyone used to make fun of us.. while we would secretly sit in her hostel room and watch the senti dialogues of Hritik Roshan over and over again.. and discuss its emotional value!
Even Shalini was quite a pro in sharing tears while watching movies.. I remember once when both of us were sitting in the TV room, with our dinner plates half full.. eyes stuck on the TV screen... gaping at it with mouth wide open ; not wanting to miss a single emotion... and watching the end sequence of this movie called "If Only".. in which Paul Nicholls dies. I dont think either of us finished our food after that.. We were so deep in melancholy!

The most embarrassing of this was my behaviour during "Veer Zaara". I really acted like one big buffoon, I swear! I had gone to watch this movie with a distant relative of mine(whom I had barely known, and my aunt had raved to him about me .. saying that she is quite a good company.. you guys must meet up in Bangalore... blah blah..!)

So, it was CAT 2005 then.. and we decided to meet after that.. for this dumb movie called Veer Zaara. I was quite comfortable with the title, coz it sounded pretty neutral!
Often I have ended up watching inappropriate movies with people .. I mean, you wouldnt obviously want to watch "Jawani Diwani" with your parents..
But I did!! It was embarrassing. Though my mom kept trying to make a conversation during the movie.. as to what to cook for dinner etc.. We were hence thrown out of the movie hall, coz of repeated complaints by the goons sitting infront of us, who were apparently getting disturbed by non-serious audience.!!! duh!!!
[... Ok, But thats a separate issue, I'll talk about that incident later! :). ]

Hmm.. so back to Veer Zaara. Since I didnt know this chap much, I thought a movie would be the best deal.. coz there will be no scope of talking... But little did I know, that when Veer would meet Zaara after 22 years - it would sweep me too into an emotional turmoil!!! Initially I started sobbing.. but when it started playing -- 'tere liye.. hum hain jiye.. har aansoon piye.." I started weeping like no one's business!
hehe!! this guy turns around to look at me.. and was taken aback to see my state!! He, on the other hand, was so far busy passing comments on the movie alongwith other light-hearted audience.. But when he saw me.. he probably felt a little embarrassed. Haha!! I still remember the look on his face..
I was busy sobbing.. when he whispered to me - "Are you ok? You need something? " and I nodded in denial.
We did not speak a word, after coming out. He looked scared and just told me that he'd call later.. and made me sit in an auto.. (coz I insisted that I was paranoid with bikes and it was ok for me to go on my own.)

Needless to say, I never saw him again. :D

I have often wondered though, why am I like that.
No clue.
I sometimes just feel like a candle - made of wax. Just a lil bit warmth.. and boom!
That day, when Ash's mom was leaving from Bangalore.. She'd been with us for about a week or so... and she just hugged me before she got into the cab. Pretty normal, hmm?
Perhaps not!
Coz when I saw her sitting in the cab.. smiling and waving back.. I could feel the tears in my eyes... I dont know wat I felt.. but it just made me want to cry..
Why? Can someone tell me what was there to get senti about.. :(

Sigh! dont know man! May be thats the way they made me!! never mind!

got less work today.. so going to watch this movie called "Life in a Metro" now.. with Gnr. He is also as jobless as me! :D

(Yeah yeah.. I have carried those tissues with me ;-).. )

so long!! adios!

may-i-help-you in making pasta! :D

2007-05-24T18:46:00.001+07:00

yay! yesterday I went Pasta shopping! It was kinda cool.. I was jumping about the whole store.. and bugging all!
The store helpers were wearing shirts which had "May I help you" written at the back, and I found it quite funny.. :D
Some of them had actually NO IDEA whatsoever, as to what their store sold!!

me(to "may-i-help-you") - Hey, excuse me. Would you have sour cream?
may-i-help-you - Yes madam, shhhyoore madam, one minute madam! (the no. of times these people insert "madam" in their sentence, makes me feel like an old school teacher!!duh!)

Then she excitedly jumped out of her seat and started taking confident steps towards one end of the store. I began to follow her, with my huge hand basket, which was getting stuck at every corner, thanks to its extra ordinarily huge size!!
I was finally relieved to have found everything under one roof.. Barely had I opened my mouth to take a sigh of relief.. when I noticed myself standing infront of a huge shelf full of face creams and body lotions! And there she stood, gaping at me with her eyes wide open.. with immense gaeity!
To add insult to injury, I suddenly noticed her index finger pointing at the Garnier Wrinkle cream!! Quite taken aback, I pretended to look at the shelf for a lilttle longer than needed.. and then asked her, if she heard me right. .and that i had mentioned 'sour' cream.. and she nodded her head saying, "Yes Madam.. here is "sore" cream madam! "

"To hell with your Madam!! "-- I thought!
So one of the basic ingredients to make the Marinara was missing..I thought I could look for the cream elsewhewre.. when it struck me, that I hadnt bought Oregano too.
So I moved back to the food area.. and decided to look at things on my own.. thinking, that sooner or later I would find them.. It would save me an agonised mind, atleast!

SO I began looking in the very very elaborate spices section.. I located the weirdest of spices.. I hadnt even heard of!! things like Asafoetida, Bishops Weed, Cassia, Fenugreek and Rosemary -- they had eveything!!! Needless to say, I had gotten all excited by now.. but hard as I tried, I was not able to locate Oregano..

me (thinking) -- Hmm.. Looks like it is alphabetically arranged.. Umm. No no.. see I find cloves before chilly powder...
Ok,.. maybe it is according to popularity! Yeah.. see.. it is salt, chilly powder, cumin seeds .. .. yeah.. yeah... but hey! wait.. I see corainder in that distant corner.. ! No no..its not according to usage..
Hmm.. may be State wise...? Cardomom and pepper are majorly grown in Kerala.. So may be the states are arranged alphabetically.. ufff!!! no! I dotn know.. this is highly complicated!!
Thinking that I might never be able to locate my stuff.. I decided to ask one may-i-help-you around...

me -- hey, could you tell me where can I find Oregano?
may-i-help-you -- Yes madam! Come madam..

I drifted slowly in her direction to be able to get the 2nd thing on my list! She stopped by at a shelf.. turned around and gave me a huge smile - since she had done her job. I waited for her to move, so that i cud take a look at the shelf.. and duh!! what was that!! she had bought me to the 'Organic products' section!!!

Man!! this was too much for me to take.. I was beginning to feel like a birdbrain, who either did not know which store to go shopping for, or had no idea how to pronounce the ingredients...or may be I completely looked like someone from some pattikad who would never try making a pasta!!

My disappointment in the store and in my ability to ever procure all the iingredients, was soaring high! So, I decided to leave after picking up the big box of Real Fruit Juice!! (did i say i am crazy about it!! :)..)

Ah.. so long.. havent you read enuf disasters tht you wanna still hang around here!!!

go go..:( this post is over !

daily happenings :)

2007-05-22T17:12:00.000+07:00

halo halo halo!!
i am a lil excited today..for no great reason though!
i have so many things to do.. and so little time!! let me try to put them down, in no order of preference.. i would then do away with those million little post-its all over my room.. :)

1. learn how to make pasta! (very very urgently!)
2. try that fruit pudding recipe which shalini's mom taught me :) yay!
3. read up and refresh and prepare for that conference!!

oh.. didnt i say that I was going to this awesome brainstorming session for my bday!!?! check out - here for details! I was thinking for sometime as to what to do for my b'day! and then I heard Guruji say this --
"Whenever we celebrate something, it is done for a reason in the past. It is gone now.
A celebration is meaningful, when it is done with a purpose. Utsav ko ek uddeshya ke saath manao. Make it a day, when you add some meaning to that celebration by committing yourself to something better for the future! "

I perhaps got my answer.. when I saw this conference notice.. and decided to go for it. :)
yay! :)

time to be quite quiet! :)

2007-05-15T15:08:00.000+07:00

so long! :)
had completely forgotten about my blog, when i get this threatening email to start blogging again, else i'd have to face severe consequences..lol! :D
i dont think i'll have many stories to share now... and hence my blog wud make a boring read..But then, i dont think i care! :)

i am in a recluse these days -- err, or so say my friends! lol..
but whatever it is, i must say, that i am realy really happy - with what i have, with what i cudnt have.. and with whatever i am doing or not doing!! :) *hint* *hint* :D

the whole of last week, i was in the AOL ashram.. went for a week long advanced meditation course.. we had a 5 day silence.. :)
cant go on to explain what it meant.. a very personal experience, but it moves!

It was such a retreat!! :) on the 3rd day, i was almost feeling, that except me, the whole nature was talking!! like the trees were talking .. the lake was talking.. like the grass was smiling at me... like the breeze was whispering in my ears.. i cud feel so much vibrations in my whole body..
if silence can give you such bliss.. why do i talk so much.. :)

Like Guruji says, that we open our mouth for just 2 things -- to eat and to talk - and both are useless!! :) how much however we eat.. its all the same after 4-5 hours! and similarly 70% of the things we talk are utter nonsense... half the time we speak just for the heck of it, or to hear answers we already know! (tell-me-i'm-right types!! ..lol..)

so many people are getting married these days, that it almost feels funny! :)
marriage is pretty funny a thing, actually. No?

sigh! so long! rest later!

:)

Lost in Love??

2007-04-01T04:34:00.000+07:00

So, it is that point of time in life, when I open the cupboard in the morning before going to office, and invariably keep aside all the so called 'short' tops.. and other hep stuff.. and quietly pick up a salwar..
I noticed the pattern, when this morning, I saw that the pile of salwars in my wardrobe was almost done ; and the pile of tops, was in a mess, with half of them unfolded.. and some of them were thrown back after a trial!! :D

may be i am getting into that mode, where suddenly you become conscious of what you wear and how you behave!

the other day i asked kinshuk, if i would be allowed to wear jeans in his house! and he broke into a fit of laughter!! and I had to explain to him, how every house has its norms :D

such is life! :)

backgrnd -- 'Lost in Love' - Air Supply
/me -

tada! i am back! :)

2007-03-19T17:17:00.000+07:00

yay! so i am back in bangalore! theres nothing like it, actually! right from the kind water-melon guy, to the polite gas agency guy.. to the pleasant kinetic guy.. i feel there is such a stark difference between the delhi people and here!
so its Ugaadi today.. and I thought that I must start the new year with a new vision.. so I went to Optolabs to get a new pair of contact lenses.. only to discover that my power has increased by 0.5!!! i think its getting relatively easier for me to fall in blind love! hehe :D

my new house is pretty cool! the room is much much bigger than the previous one! the only sad part being, that there is no place where I can put my nice cane swing! :( can i cry?

i wil have to sell it.. any takers? :P

work at office is refusing to unburden me. is it supposed to go on like this?! duh!

more later!

bckgrnd -- Tere Bina - Guru
/me -

so, its time to go.. :(

2007-02-23T02:37:00.000+07:00

awww.. farewells always make me senti.. :(
I had such an awesome farewell party today.. with my whole big department.. and a senti speech in the end by my manager..
i really wasnt prepared for that.. and i almost felt like crying! :( they gave me a sweet little gift.. and i had to stand up and say a few words..
i didnt really know i had to do something like that.. stand up infront of 20 people and make a speech.. and be politically correct :D
and then i started talking.. and words kept coming.. and i just kept talking what i felt..
i took a breath after a sentence.. and i cud feel myself getting carried away... and so i decided to stop :(
how all the time just flew past by.. and boom! its time to go back!

isnt it funny.. how all the situations in life come coupled with some bit of irony ..
i am excited to go back.. and meet up with kinshuk.. and go home,, and haev lots of new things to do in bangalore.. and at the same time.. i am leaving a certain something back here..
how soon people become significant in your life..and how soon they go away....

ohh.. i am getting senti,...

/me -

Made in India!

2007-02-22T05:59:00.000+07:00

This morning, when I woke up, for some reason, I found myself humming this really really old song - called 'made in india' by alisha chenoy!!
Actually it happens very often.. that I wake up with a tune in my head! :D
I havent even heard this song, ever since Alisha stopped making albums of her own!
so here I am brushing my teeth and humming it.... taking a shower and humming it... getting ready and humming it.. making lunch.. and then err.. stop! lets download it first!!
so i download it.. and then start listening to it.. while making lunch!!
its actually quite a cool song! i remember its video.. in which alisha is sitting like a queen somewehre.. and they bring one hunk packed in a box, and the box says - made in india! hehe..

dekhi hai saari duniya, japan se leke russia..
australia se leke americaaaaaaaaaa...
dekha hai pyaar ka sapna
dil chahe koi apna.. mil jaaye gar koi saathiya.. koi desiyaaaaaaaa..
made in india.. made in india.. ek dil chahiye thats made in india!!

oh.. i love it!!

Get it here
/me --

The "Yay.!!"s :)

2007-02-16T02:12:00.000+07:00

Hmm.. now I want to go back, go back, go back soooooooon!! :)
8 more days to go.. !!

Got to finish some shopping.. some bookings.. some see-offs.. and LOTS of work :)

llalalllalaaaa llalaalllalallla ..

and then i will meet kinshuk! and then i will go home! and then i will go to rishikesh and do the AOL course! and then i will go to bangalore and shift houses to stay with ash and shilpa!! its all going to be so much fun! :)

yay!!

Its Valentine's Day!!! :)

2007-02-14T05:07:00.000+07:00

So!! Its Valentine's Day yet again! :) Yet again, the shopping areas and gift shops are flooding with people buying gifts n cards n chocolates for their significant others.. and there are valentine's day specials everywhere -- on TV, on websites, on news channels, on roads, in restaurants.. phew! everywhere!! :)

and yet again, i am not with him...:(

i hate some of these websites. they make sure that they throw the most sentimental dialogues blinking in red and blue as soon as you open their page..
"When you can't be there, make sure the flowers are.. "
I mean, what the heck. I was almost getting carried away, when the logical me took over. hehe.. :D

But hey, whatever it is, I am still excited that its Valentine's Day!! and that I am going to wear my pretty red dress today.. and that I am going to cook his favourite dinner.. and that I am going to send a huuuuuuuuuuge bouquet of red roses to him and that i am going to write the most romantic email to him! :)

after all, wherever you are, whatever you're doing..life is all about doing it in 'style' ..!!! :)

backgrnd - "Say it right - Nelly Furtado"
/me --

11,111 !!

2007-02-07T03:07:00.000+07:00

there are currently 11,087 visitors to my blog!! soon the no. will be 11, 111 !!
i am excited!! thinking of some way to celebrate it!! any suggestions?! :)

it gotta be a blog-related celebration!!
may be i cud change the template! or.. lets say, may be i suddenly reveal, that i am not what you think i am..( you know just for the kick! ).. or i cud reveal some big secret of my life, whcih has been off line all this while!! or.. or.. orr.... umm.. i dont know!!
bu something gotta be done!!

help help!

itz chicago baby!

2007-02-03T10:28:00.000+07:00

going to chicago tomorrow!! i am so excited, cant describe!! :)
hoping to have a grrrrrreat time with eslyn, jisha, kaps and madhav!! (in alphabetical order ofcourse!! )
am excited, am excited, am excited!! :)

/me --

the cleaner guy.. phew!

2007-01-31T02:12:00.000+07:00

today has been such a wierd day.. first i woke up late at 6.45am, realised i had a conference call at 7.30.. and another meeting at 8.15!!

so, rushed through to take a shower.. missed my meditation activities.. quickly made lunch.. and dialled in from the hotel itself.. then dropped off half way in the call so that i cud rush and catch up for the 8.15 cattle call!!! And only to realise on the way, that it was a tuesday and the meeting at 8.15 was actually scheduled for wednesday!!

i was like, damn!! where is my focus!!

came to offce.. and loads of mails.. lots of work yet again.. somehow managed to wind it up by 12..
when i realised, oh.. i havent called kinshuk today! spoke with him.. and that helped me relax for sometime.. :)
theen thought i shud have my lunch.. only to realise that i forgot to put salt in the pulao!! :(
i was in no mood to go to the cafeteria and get salt.. so just ate some with curd and pickle.. and had some juice and stuff!! needless to say, i was massive pissed off till now!!

then suddenly this 'gang of cleaners' landed in my office.. they wanted to clean my room and were not ready to listen to anything other than "ok, you may"!! :))
so i was supposed to get up and leave the room.. while they'll scramble up all my neatly scattered papers... hehe.. i got up.. and was about to leave.. when one of the senior looking cleaner stared at me with eyes popped out..
i was already mad as hell, to top that, an unexpected stare from a broom holder was the last thing i ever wanted!!

so i stopped and said- yes?
he looked at me.. and started shaking in an abnormal fashion.. i was really stunned, and thought may be i stepped on his foot by mistake or something.. or god knows if i resemble his age old enemy.. i was genuinely scared to see the look in his eyes.. thats when i saw him slowly move his index finger...
it was pointing towards my laptop kept on the table..
at this instant, i took a deep breath.. and went closer to him.. and asked him as politely as i could - "what are you trying to say?!? "
he strained his eyes, bent a little, turned his back towards me, and said -- "Take the laptop with you, and work in the lobby, while I clean up your office with my team. We dont want to be disrupting your business. These are IBM values."...

bang!!! boom!!! #%$^#*&)

I was zapped.

I quietly took my laptop, unplugged the charger, and walked out of the room.

Stood in the lobby outside the room.. and pretended to work.. I was shivering with this guy's loud voice still echoing in my ears!! I almost felt, that if he sees me not typing something for 180 seconds, he will probably run towards me with his vacuum cleaner to hit me!!
man, was I scared or what!

After some 30 minutes, he finished his work.. and went out, uttering something, which I thought was a 'thank you'...
strangely, he didnt go to any of the adjacent rooms with his 'so called team' and teach IBM values..

i was impressed with the way he cleaned.. not a thing was moved from its place.. but the whole place was spic-and-span! :)

such was the day.. with all its weirdness!! :)
i took a break to scribble it down for my own memory sake!! hehehahahaha! :))

going to chicago next week.. and will catch up with kaps, essie, jisha and madhav!! excited.com!
yay! life is good.. only if my dates to go back to india will somehow come soooon!!

backgrnd -- "kaun kehte hain bhagwan aate nahin.. tum meera ke jaise bulate nahin.. " :) (Download here)
/me --

perfection...

2007-01-26T04:13:00.000+07:00

why do i seek perfection in everything i do? why do i want my conversations to have a perfect ending? why do i want to talk about perfect topics which involve no clash and contradiction of opinions?
why is it necessary that everything has to be perfect all the time? ALL the time!?!?

am i being melodramatic, or intentionally depressing?
i am just tired. i dont like this entire activity of being here in US...:(
i have always done things which "feel right"..no matter how illogical.
and, somehow there is no feel good factor while i am here in US.. although they serve you dollars on a plate everyday!! :( somehow, i am not able to encash my smile for it..
thing is to realise, what matters to you most.
i know my answer, hence the big decision which rolled out of my mailbox this morning.

i got nothing to my name now.. only hopes and dreams.. :)
i am much better now.. and the situation - less imperfect!! :)

bckgrd -

"You stand before me
Now we stare eye to eye
Before another second clicks away, one of us will die
You reach for your metal as I reach for mine
The sound of bullets flying through the air is followed by a cry
And there cryin'

What will we do, what will we say when it’s the end of this game that we play
Will we crumble into the dust, my friend
Or will we start this game over again..."

Dangerous game -- 3 doors down..

/me -- =

My diary :)

2007-01-20T03:26:00.000+07:00

Thought of using the scanner at office..!! its been rusting there for quite sometime! hehe..

bckgrnd -- "Kaise hai yeh rut - dil chahta hai"
/me -- well!!? dont you know by now!?! :)

drumstick sambar rox :)

2007-01-17T02:14:00.000+07:00

i am soooooooooooo delighted!! i just had drumstick sambhar!! :) yay!! yay!!! :)
i am so crazy about this entire activity - of me looking at drumstick sambar.. yum yum... then getting thrilled..yum yum...then grabbing a plate, putting a heap of rice on my plate, and then pouring the hot steaming.. yum yum .. sambar.. yum yum.. on it...yum yum!!! :)

who?! exactly who discovered this activity called drumstick!! i want to kiss his hands! :)

kannan sweetly invited us to his place for pongal.. and man!! i was feeling so damn hungry with the whole day of mad work at office.. and was dying to get back home!
but arun lured me to come to the library before we reached kannan's place.. !!
i bought 2 books and a DVD... but who in the whole wide world has the time to read it!! i am missing my reading here.. :( .. there is just no time!!
when i come back from office, its almost a sin to do anything other than eat, sleep and talk on fone!

so i have decided to cut down on my sleep a bit,.. and give room for the books that i bought!! i am pretty thrilled about one of it called -- 'At first sight' by Nicholas Sparks. The guy looked pretty cool on the cover, hope he writes well too!!

whoa!! what a day!! although for some reason my head is spinning like a fly wheel right now.. but i am not thinking much abt it.. :)
time to sleep!!

bckgrnd -- "salaam-e-ishq -- title track" - awesommmmmmmmmmmmme song!!
/me - -

Sony PS3 (!!) and me! :)

2007-01-12T00:05:00.001+07:00

Spoke with Laina on the phone today,, She is one person, who always.. always...always makes me smile.. and have that adrenaline rush when we talk about doing crazy things!!! :)

Hehe.. yesterday there was free lunch at the cafeteria.. IBM was celebrating launch of Sony Playstation, for which the micro processors were designed by it.
So there was this Play Station installed by them.. and a moderator who was trying to lure people to come and play it.. and experience the blah blah features!

Me, and two friends were rushing to catch up with a 1pm meeting.. but ofcourse, couldnt just ignore the temptation to play on that awesome looking system.. it was a car racing game.. So there we jump and say -- 'Ok.. We are going next!! "

One vrrom vrrrroooooooom session and I kept banging everywhere.. I know I am bad at playing all these games.. but dont know why, I still do it!! :) Everyone stood surrounding me.. and that took away half my focus.. !!! and I was screaming "oh no! oh damn! oh comon.. I cant do this"... and people were cheering me..

The entire game had suddenly become a big deal.. and within minutes, other people who were sitting around also hopped over to see what was up!! hahahaha!! I had made such a joke of myself!!!

After much hue and cry, I finished eighth.
Out of 10.
But I had a lot of fun!! :) People started moving saying.. "That was good! Good show! "
Wonder if they were talking about the awesome graphics or my skills! lol!!

bckgrnd -- "yun hi chala chal rahee - swades"
/me -- 2 x

what gives us the zsa zsa zsu!!

2007-01-11T12:12:00.000+07:00

Sometimes I think as to what it takes to make a relationship work?
What is a relationship, without the "zsa zsa zsu"!!?

One could probably be in a comfortable relationship with his/her best friend,having a good time.. hanging out..sharing feelings and thoughts.. but without the sex part, will it give you butterflies in the stomach??

Perhaps not.

So then when it comes to say "I do".. wats more important..? sex or friendship?

bckgrnd -- nil
/me -

lol day!!

2007-01-10T10:40:00.000+07:00

oh my god!! today i watched this movie called "little miss sunshine" in $1 !! was fun.. i just died laughing!! it was so damn funny!! :)

i accessed blogger after so long.. and i had no idea it has merged with google!! awesome!! i love the gmail id written at the top of the window as i type this post.. :)

actually i was thinking today.. that when i am away from my place.. i am actually in touch with only those.. who matter! really.. :)
and they are not too many.. may be just 3 people in my whole list of gtalk messenger and orkut!..
just 3 people -- one being mom-dad!!!
i genuinely dont seem to care what others want or think.. and this is so much better than doing fake conversations with people all the time..
man, i am beginning to hate these messengers.. they are just some make-believe tools!
people ping.. say "hey! hello! whats up!? whats going on!? hows work? hows US ?? send pics!" ........ this & that!
i wonder, how many of them are genuinely interested in how i am! or whats my work load.. how does it matter to anyone save me? or how is US.. send pics.. blah blah..
dont know, i find it phoney!

anyways... good night to me :)

bckgrnd -- "nil"
/me -

Is everything a choice?

2007-01-08T06:14:00.000+07:00

Yeah.. been long! I havent had the zest to write.. Was so busy with myself!! hehe.. Let me know if you find a word for that sorta situation!! lol..
Life has been great! Perhaps thats why I fell short of any attempt to sum it up in words..

I did certain things.. made some big decisions. took some revolutionary steps. hurt a few people.. made a couple of friends.. Good fun!

You know I always thought, that things happen to us. And that we are mere spectators to whats been written 'up there' ! As funny as it sounds.. I now believe, that we do "choose" what happens.

Its life's hardest truth - as I see it. Coz it causes us to realize that we have chosen the life we are living right now.

Yeah.. Life is choices.

You have chosen to live this day. You have chosen to read my blog. You have chosen to live in a certain city. You have chosen to believe certain ideas. You have chosen the people you call friends.

You choose the food you eat, the clothes you wear, and the thoughts you think. You choose to be calm or restless, you choose to feel appreciative or ungrateful.

Love is a choice. Anger is a choice. Fear is a choice. Courage is a choice.

You choose.

Isnt it also a liberating thought!? :)

I am so happy with myself that I cannot begin to wonder more about it, than I'm doing already!
Will be more regular with my blogs now.. Keeps me on the roll!

Bravo!

bkgrnd -- "justin timberlake --sexyback" -- I love this one!!!
/me -

:)

2006-10-11T13:52:00.000+07:00

Its been quite gradual. Life has settled into a no-hassles, no crap activity.
A totally relaxed and peaceful mind..
I swear Art of Living has done so much good to me, that I often wonder how a non AOL person survives..(and why!) :)

There is absolutely zilch work at office these days.. and that leaves a lot of time for me to read all my nice books on the shelf, to go for all those long morning walks by myself when I dont have to worry abt getting late for office..for listening to all those knowledge tapes by Guruji and for talking with Kinshuk for as long as I want.. without worrying if I have to sleep early :)

I am so excited Shalini is coming on the 18th!! She'll be here for a few hours.. but I am sure we can make the most of it! :)

bkgrnd -- ' Paris Hilton -- stars are blind'
/me --

the IBM Blues show!!

2006-10-07T01:20:00.000+07:00

Oh man!! It was so awesome! We had the IBM Blues 2006 show today.. the annual cultural show for IBM Bangalore.. and guess who was the compere for it!! haha.. yeah ..it was moi!!! :)

Initially when Manish had asked me to do it.. I was all dull and said a No. But later on something struck and I was like.. ok, let me do it.. it'll be fun! And I was not wrong!!

The last 4-5 days were full of running around.. and practicing..and dress designing etc! And today was the Big day! Ah, I am so glad that all went well! :)

Feeling excited.. feeling tired.. and feeling blue!! :) -- the 'irony' is overwhelming! :)

backgrnd -- "Doing that thing you do! - Wonders"
/me --

Natural Salt vs. Iodized salt

2006-10-05T17:10:00.000+07:00

Read this article somewhere..Dont know why, but I feel very strongly about this whole banning of natural salt issue very unjustified. Sigh..

******

Advantages of Natural Sea Salt:

Containing all of the 84 elements found in your body, the benefits include:

1. Regulating the water content throughout your body.

2. Balancing excess acidity from your cells, particularly your brain cells. Balancing your blood sugar levels and helping to reduce your aging rate.

3. Assisting in the generation of hydroelectric energy in cells in your body.

4. Absorption of food particles through your intestinal tract.

5. Help in clearing mucus plugs and phlegm from your lungs - particularly useful in asthma and cystic fibrosis.

6. Acts as a strong natural antihistamine and helps clear up congestion in your sinuses

7. Prevention of muscle cramps.

8. Making the structure of your bones firm - osteoporosis can occur when your body needs more salt and takes it from your bones.

9. Regulating your sleep - it is a natural hypnotic.

10. Maintaining your libido.

11. Preventing varicose veins and spider veins on your legs and thighs.

12. Stabilizing irregular heartbeats - in conjunction with water it is actually essential for the regulation of your blood pressure.

Drawbacks of Iodized Salt:

Iodizes salt is obtained by chemically cleaning the natural salt which removes all the minerals found in natural salt. What remains after typical salt is "chemically cleaned" is sodium chloride - an unnatural chemical form of salt that your body recognizes as something completely foreign. This form of salt is in almost every preserved product that you eat. Therefore, when you add more salt to your already salted food, your body receives more salt than it can dispose of.

In order for your body to try to metabolize iodized salt crystals, it must sacrifice tremendous amounts of energy.

Inorganic sodium chloride upsets your fluid balance and constantly overburdens your elimination systems, which can impair your health.

When your body tries to isolate the overdose of salt you typically expose it to, water molecules must surround the sodium chloride to break them up into sodium and chloride ions in order to help your body neutralize them. To accomplish this, water is taken from your cells and you have to sacrifice the perfectly structured water already stored in your cells in order to neutralize the unnatural sodium chloride.

This results in dehydrated cells that can prematurely kill them.

Continuous use of iodised salts can cause:

Unsightly cellulite
Rheumatism, arthritis and gout
Kidney and gall bladder stones

Reason Government gives to Ban natural salt and promote iodised salt?

It says since to prevent diseases related to lack of iodine, iodised salt must be used. And since people are illiterate, so they wont know what salt to use. Therefore, if there is only one salt people will have to use it anyways and hence natural salt should be banned.

Even if iodised salt is used to treat lack of iodine deficiency disorders?

1) Adding iodine to salt is called fortification. During fortification the iodine content in the salt is 74%. But this content reduces down to 7-8% till it reaches common household. Iodine gets lost in storage etc…Plus due to our cooking methods, i.e. we add salt during cooking another (50 t0 60%) of whatever iodine is left also evaporates. So what finally people receive, that iodine is less than required per individual. What’s the use then??

2) Iodine deficiency is only found in regions near the Himalayan Belt. So there is no point making iodised salt compulsory on a national scale.

However, the most significant decline in the consumption of iodised salt has happened in places where a ban has been in force for the past two decades – the north-eastern states and Uttar Pradesh! The present Salt Commissioner S Sundaresan conceded in January 2004 that as per a survey commissioned by UNICEF and the Uttar Pradesh state government, 70 per cent of iodised salt was found to contain less than 5 PPM (parts per million) against the prescribed level of 15 PPM.

This indicates the quality of iodised salts being used in the country and there are no efficient testing methods available to ensure the good quality of iodised salts.

3) For a person whose iodine content intake is normal, if he is put on iodised salt it is very likely he can start suffering from what is called hyperthyroidism (disease due to excessive thyroid hormones). According to doctors, hyperthyroidism is on a rise these days in India.

In China, in 1995 the natural salt was banned and iodised salt was made compulsory. But no significant results were seen even after 5 years of this law in China.

Reasons:

1) Much of Iodine is lost till it reaches consumer. And when salt is added during cooking, again a high percentage of remaining iodine evaporates. Consumers still don’t get required iodine intake from iodised salt.

2) Deficiency of iodine is only in a specific region. So no satisfactory results were obtained when this law was applied on a national scale.

Conclusion:

Even iodised salt is not being able to provide the iodine content required due to losses of iodine. Since it is area specific (Himalayan belt region), applying it on a national scale is deadly as it may lead to hyperthyroidism. In India cases of hyperthyroidism is on a rise.

There are many minerals available in natural salt that are very essential for the normal functioning of the body. Iodised salt is Pure Sodium Chloride which is a foreign element to the body and hence not at all beneficial for our body.

Iodised salt should be available in areas where there is a significant iodine deficiency (maybe made compulsory in those areas) but natural salt should not be banned on a national scale and should be available to every person.

Iodised salt has been previously also made compulsory in many north-eastern states before but no significant improvement has been seen in these endemic regions. This is due to the poor quality of iodised salts that reach people. Government should also ensure that the quality of iodised salts should be good to solve the problem of iodine deficiency else promoting iodised salts is anyways of no use as statistics have shown before.

So Why Government is still pressing for Iodized salt?

Because well over 90% of the world's salt is being used directly for industrial purposes that require pure sodium chloride. The remaining percentage is used for preserving processes and ends up on your kitchen table.

With the use of rigorous advertising, the salt industry is successful in convincing you there are actually health advantages to adding potentially toxic iodine and fluoride to salt. In addition, your table salt very often contains dangerous preservatives not required to be listed on the packaging. Calcium carbonate, magnesium carbonate, and aluminium hydroxide are often added to improve the ability of table salt to pour. Aluminium is a light alloy that deposits into your brain - a potential cause of Alzheimer's disease

2006-09-23T14:01:00.000+07:00

haha! life is fun these days.. a lotta things have changed..me is enjoying the metamorphised self! :D
went to mangalore for two days.. just me and mum - a little junket!
it is such an awesome place! ah, i should hv been born in one of these coastal areas..i swear i regret things about kanpur! :D

well, if you're thinking that i am going to be resuming blogging from now on.. then well... err... hmm... you are not so wrong... :)

i am going to be posting pics of 'me-n-mum in mangalore' soon..
but where be the data transfer cable? -- in office!! :P
so i am going to be doing this all-important task tomorow :)

ciao!!

2006-08-16T14:10:00.000+07:00

Something has changed. I am becoming averse to people. I really dont know why. But I just am. I hardly ever login to ne messenger now.. Been equally long that I wrote a proper long mail to anyone. Not met any friend in person for so long. My phone is particularly enjoying the luxury of being unimpeded! haha
But its a life without regret! I like being by myself. :)
Sometimes I think that I had had an overdose of people. Too many. So much that I had stopped responding to my own needs. I had become people-driven.
Sometimes we create a lot of problems in our life just by talking too much.

I want to do the Advanced Course of Art of Living in March, in Rishikesh. Its going to be so much fun. Hopefully I will come back from US till then.

Rachita's parents are here.. And it is so nice. Feels good..You know, the mere feeling that someone tells you - "hey, come home soon in the evening ok.. we'll be waiting for dinner" is so wonderful.
I sometimes think that I'm missing such basic wondrous things in life, and I dont know for what.
For a job? For designing chips for IBM? For money? Is it all so indispensable that I am forgetting how to smile?

2006-08-14T16:53:00.000+07:00

The last three days were so wonderful!
Kinshuk was here.. and I spent good time with him.. Missed work on Friday, despite heavy schedule of releases and loads of work, that I was answerable for!
Thankfully a nice and helpful colleague promised to manage things for me on Friday..
May God Bless her! :)

Mom n Dad would be coming next Monday and I am going to be having a whole lot of relief.. !
What with not having to cook breakfast and dinner for one whole month!! :)

Have to go for a relatives' wedding to Kerala in the end of the month - which I am NOT particularly excited about! I was, a couple of months ago.. but not any more. Dont know why.
Why I am excited instead is that I am going to wear a typical mallu set mundu or kasavu naeriyathu and also wear flowers in my hair -- something which I've never done before! Not supposed to be all that cool up North!
The thought of doing somethng like this sure releases my "lets-have-some-fun" hormones!! Thats quite a relief! :)

backgrnd - "Art of Living CD" - Bhajans
/me -

Ctrl + Alt + Del

2006-08-04T18:49:00.000+07:00

Ok, its time that I restart blogging. haha!
I have been - honestly, genuinely, really, frankly - held up with all sorts of things in life!
Including - loads of work at office + making methodical career moves + getting the 'relationships' curve straight in ma life :) and having NDEs!! (Near death experiences!)

(Ok, the last one was for effect.)

You know whats killing? That you want to do a particular thing, but mother destiny takes away the "time" dish from ur platter!! and you go boohoo!!

I am not surprised that I am bunking work today, and going for TShirt shopping with Babitha!!
Have big plans this weekend, and I gotta squeeze this Tshirt painting spree in between those hours!!

wokay! so I sign off. Hopefully will blog next from my newbie laptop, which my manager gleefully endowed upon me!

PS - Its strange. Nearly half the time I am on my comp, I feel like theres someone standing behind me.
I feel haunted. :-\

2006-07-28T22:20:00.000+07:00

Been long!
I've been upto so many things that its almost ridiculous trying to put them down!! hehe :D

I am enjoying myself a lot!! Excited about a whole lot of new things happening around!!

So trust me when I say that - I shall be back, SOON!!!! and with a lot os new stories! :)

haha!

the flyover and the remote control!

2006-07-12T16:40:00.000+07:00

Hola!! I am so excited today! For the first time in my entire life, I saw an inaugration ceremony - that too LIVE!! yay!

There is this flyover that has come up on airport road quite close to my house. And I was elated about its inaugration today, coz I have seen it come up from its inception stage till final completion. And it just looked quite cool.. the way they constructed the entire flyover without hindering the traffic at any single day!!
So when today I was walking down to office I saw this huge crowd.. and I was informed that the inaugration was to take place in abt half an hour! Man!! Was I thrilled or wat!

There were quite a few people hovering all over.. and waitin for the CM to come over and do his thing.. I jostled my way through that huge mob.. must admit, most of which were local shopkeepers, auto drivers, vegetable vendors, masons and other sordid-looking cheap men who were quite liberal with their amorous glances!! duh!

After a lot of hustle bustle and pushing around, I narrowed my way close to the foundation stone.. (Well, there was a foundation stone there, was visible only later when the curtain unveiled! hehe)

After waiting for a couple of minutes.. we see this huge convoy of cars... and our man gets out of it.. (Nah.. I am not a huge fan of Kumaraswamy ; the 'our man' terminology is just for the effect! :D) All photographers and all go *click* *click*.. lots of flashes and mayhem..People wanted to capture every minute of the "going-to-get-over-in-five-minutes" activity! and so people who so far were standing behind me like pet dogs, suddenly got a wild rush of blood and started behaving like ferocious wild beasts. They started peeping and kneeling on their toes to see it all..

Ou man, then was presented with a funky remote control.. He smiled gleefully. Then a pundit did some pooja and the sorts.. and our dude pressed the button on the remote control.. and 'swooooooosh' -- bang! the curtain unveiled!! It had hid behind itself a fundoo foundation stone!! with some stuff inscribed on it with golden letters! w0w! I was kinda excited to see all this from like 100 meters distance!
Then our dude was presented with a pair of scissors and he cut the ribbon..( which looked damn fragile neways...).. As soon as he cut it.. I was among the first people to start clapping! :) hehe...
Then our man looked around.. and the police men started running around to control the crowd which was kinda growing mad,. I could so relate to their ecstasy levels!! :)

It was hardly a five-minute affair, which ended as soon as the hero of the story jumped inside his car to inaugrate the flyover from the Indira nagar side as well..

I looked at the watch. It was 11o'clock. I had almost spent 1 hour there!!
But I was so glad I dint miss this awesaaam chance of seeing something so cool.. I dont think I was going to be able to see any such ceremony ever again!!
yay!

bckgrnd - "kabhi alvida na kehna - title track"
/me -

tears that fall from eyes...

2006-06-30T23:04:00.000+07:00

There was a yesterday. There were tears, there was pain. There was laughter and there was joy.

Now, yesterday is gone. I am here. This moment - this very moment is truth.

I am feeling a bit uneasy.
Life has a purpose. But I seem to be split into two. One half 'wants' to do something, but the other half tells that its 'supposed' to be doing something else.

So, it is 3 in the night, and I am here putting a night out in office.
Working?
Yes, I was - till 12am. Then didnt feel like going back.
So, I'm here. Sitting, looking at the runway.. seeing the flights take off.

I have so much of ambition, that sometimes I feel stifled. I feel like I am wasting each and every minute of my existence, doing something totally unwanted.

I want to get into the IIMs. I know I belong right there. RIGHT THERE!!! And nowhere else.
Been there.. just there.. but missed it.
I am not going to give it up. There is a seat right there - only for me. Did you hear that? ONLY for me!!

Background is playing 'Tears' by Dream Theater. It is such a beautiful song. I want to play it on my guitar.
But I'm here. Sitting, thinking, sipping coffee.. looking outside the window.. waiting for the sun to rise.. and tell me - "Its another day! One day less to the day when you'll be out of Bangalore. For good!!"

The song, I say - is beautiful . Get it here - http://www.sendmefile.com/00418352

It is true. It is 'quite' something to cry for someone. To actually let tears fall from eyes.. roll down your cheeks.. and feel that pain..

Have I cried?
Yes. Many times. When tears come, you forget all logic. You are just 'one' with that feeling. That feeling of helplessness. And that feeling of immense anxiety.

When I was a child, I dont remember ever crying for toys/clothes/chocolates etc. I was never interested in those.
Yes, I remember crying for going to bday parties (which my parents were quite against).
I cried for marks. When I used to miss 1st rank in class by 2 marks. For me, those marks were nto important, but that feeling of losing to someone similar to me used to suck. Big Time.

When I grew up, I cried when I saw my own family members fight against each other for trivial issues like money/property. Ok, not trivial - may be it was a BIG deal for them.
I remember sobbing in a corner, with my Differential Calculus book, pretending to study.

I used to sit on my terrace in the night for hours - looking at the moon - thinking about how my uncles' and aunts' behaviour had changed towards me,who was their cute lil adorable niece - just coz they were at odds with my parents...

I also remember wailing for months, when I broke up with Bhaskar. Things never became better between us ever since that day, although we tried hard to become good friends...

After that, I have not been much bothered about things happening around, other than minor activities here and there that induce transient sadness.

A lot of people walked in and out of my life.. I have cried for some of them.. only to realise in the end, that it was all so fake.. and that I was surrendering to a happiness which was as abysmal as was the love they pretended to have for me...

I am content in my life now. I know what I want, where I want to go. I can distinguish between things that are worth it and those which are of no significance. I have someone like Kinshuk to spend my life with. I have my dreams.. Think I need nothing else..just nothing else...

backgrnd - 'Tears - Dream Theater"
/me -

2006-06-28T21:20:00.000+07:00

Life's busy.
Busy and interesting.
Interesting and good.
I should be back shortly.

Amen.

bckgrnd - Euro trip - Scotty doesnt know! (I love it! :D)
/me -

The "He" who shall not be named! :D

2006-06-13T16:15:00.000+07:00

Till about a month ago, my days in office were kinda doomed with no good looking guys around to letch at! sigh, I had accepted it. No, I really had!! :)
But ever since this new chap(the_he_who_shall_not_be_named) joined.. life was beginning to look rosy again! hehe..
He is kinda cute..and quiet.
I like quiet guys. :)

Actually for me its quite simple. Our dude doesnt really have to be some stud muffin.
If he is wearing a nice crisp kurta, its job half done! I slobber over guys who are in kurtas! sadly, there are not many of this variety! :D

I also find myself drooling over guys with long hair!! Long-hair-well-kept! :)
Dunno! I feel, opting to keep long hair - speaks chronicles of any guy's audacity and ability to do different stuff!! Its kinda cool! :) Really cool!

Ok, coming back to our he_who_shall_not_be_named in office.
He doesnt fall in any of the above categories.. btu still there is a kinda aura about him.. Very attractive.

So long, till I learnt last week, that he is engaged!!!
I was heartbroken! :D

So much was okay. But today I saw him koochi-kooing with some woman in the cafeteria!! This was too much, alright! hehe..

[At lunch today]

Hari - Sugz, eat your food.. whom are you looking for?

me- Yeah yeah.. trying to locate him.. (looking around).. ah!there!! right there he is!!

Hari(shrugging shoulders) - Hopeless!

Sajay - Hey! Your guy is with some woman! There..(pointing right).. did you see them?

me - Holy Christ!!!! yeah he indeed his!! good heavens, whats the world come to!:(

Kenneth - He is engaged Sugz,,now you got no hope left.

me (pouting) - he is engaged. not married still. *wink*

All - What!?!

me(after a deep breath) - Its no going to work out this way. We need to decide on a strategy. A well-planned plot.

Prakash - You dont even know him. We got to start things from scratch.

Sajay - Ah! To hell with your plots and schemes. I will scrap him on orkut and tell him that you are interested in him.

me - Duh! No way! Theres a charm in being 'subtle'. One doesnt do stupid on-the-face things like this.

Prakash(taking a bite) - By the time you finish completing your acts of subtlety his kids will start going to kindergarten..

Hari - I agree. (getting excited).. Its time to be quick! Let come up with some great idea to get to talk to him..trap him and then break off his committed status!!

Sajay(interrupting) - I have a feeling this woman with him is his fiancee, Look at the way they are talking.. (nodding his head) Infact I am sure!

Hari(ogling at her) - The girl looks good! hmm...(then turning to me). you know we guys dont mind letching at girls who are committed/married/divorced/single...whatever! Its just you girls..who have all these weird issues!! huh..

me(fondling with my spoon) - Hmm.. I still feel we should have a planned strategy. You know, Step 1, Step 2.. like that! :D

Kenneth(without looking up) - Ok.. So whats Step 1?

me - Well, Step 1 should be - that we "observe" him! We see, who he talks to, what time he comes, what time he goes.. *shrug*.. you know, those kinds!!

Kenneth - well! Why should "we" observe him? Lets do this - "You" observe him.. and "we' observe his girl! (winking at Hari).. What say ??!

Hahahahaha. Loud laughter!

Prakash - ok, jokes apart. He is also in PD. You are also in PD. Just go ask some doubt today.. and introduce yourself.

me(winking) - Hmm.. That sounds like a good idea. I can do that.

Kenneth - Actually, I guess he is quite a nerd. The first day when I met him at a game of TT, all he asked me was, if I were also in PD.

me - See!! There!! THERE!!! You should have said - "I am not in PD, but Sugandh is in PD" and happily introduced me to him! Now if you do so, it'll be all fishy!! sigh!
You betrayed me Kenneth!! That was such a golden chance!

Kenneth - Yeah right!! I dint know then, that you were interested in him!

me- You never bothered to ask me if I was!

Kenneth - yeah right!! You expected me to go around asking people if they were interested in this dude.. and then count the no. of raised hands.. then tick mark the ones in PD team, and organised a "know-each-other-camp"!! ???

Hari - hahahahahaha.

me- shut up!

Prakash - Ok guys! Lets go now. I have a lot of work.

Sajay - Yeah. Lets go.

[/At lunch today]

Sigh! So my love story was dismissed even before it began!!

hehe.. :D

bckgrnd - "Sarina Paris - Look at us now'
/me -

armed to the teeth!! duh.

2006-06-07T18:23:00.000+07:00

Whats up in life?! Hmm.. good question! :)

I thought of squandering some money.. So went to this Dentist yesterday.
At this pointa time, I'd like to mention, that I got the worst sort of dentition ever known to haev found in any human being! My front teeth are two long canines with pointed edges. The premolars are kinda skewed to a 45 degrees angle... and the molar teeth are asymmetrically arranged at irregular intervals.

Armed with such an abstruse pair of jaws, I entered the doc's chamber. I suddenly felt a lil excited,
(as usual! I have this knack of getting excited at just all the wrong moments of life!)
The door had a poster which said - "Leave your footwear and worries outside" . I smiled!

I had an appointment with him, so when I knocked, he looked into the register, and murmured - "Hmm.. Sugandh.."

I smiled again.

Suddenly I became aware of the 'incorrect business of 32' sitting inside my mouth.. and I quickly shut my mouth which was wide open by now, in my attempt to smile gracefully..

---
me - Hi!
Doc - Hi, This is Dr. Farhan. Come here, on this chair...Lets see whats up.

me(smiling in a meaningless fashion and in an attempt to start a conversation) - I have a complicated case for you doctor!!! haha.. :). (I was so sure that after he looks at my 'vicious circle', I was gonna be a legend in the annals of dental history! )
Doc(with absolutely no expression on his face, and a serious tone) - I like complicated cases. They are interesting.

me - hmm.
-------

Neways, after a series of inspectional activities and round of questions answers, he put something called as 'separators' and asked me to rest in peace.

I haev a feeling that this is going to be one of those things in life, which I have been initially excited about,, but have lost interest later!

But now, the thing is that I am going to be unable to eat properly for a couple of months.. I am thinking of signing a contract with Ganesh Fruit Juice Centre for Home delivery- 5 times a day :D

bckgrnd - "Jhalak dikhla ja!" - Himesh Reshammiya thingie..
/me -

my new house snaps :)

2006-06-02T22:32:00.000+07:00

A few snaps - Here !!!

"Bitter" Sweet Symphony..er... "gourd"!! :D

2006-06-02T18:30:00.000+07:00

halo halo halo!

After all the mayhem and rucus I finally dint get tix for Chennai for the weekend.. *sigh*
How I thought I'll have a good time meeting up with Sind, Vinod and Gnr.. but no!! do the transportation services like seeing me happy? they dont! huh..

After numerous "you-hate-me-thats-why-you-made-bittergourd-for-dinner" episodes with Shalini, I finally found someone who likes bittergourd and eats it too!! :)
[bckgrnd plays - I found my heaven right here with you,, Believe in me forever, I believe in youuuuuuuuu :) :)]

/me bows and thanks Sajay, for now I look at the bittergourd section in the grocery shop and dont look away!! :)
I made some today and bought it to office,,, he finished it in a matter of 5 minutes, even before the rest of the food came!! hahaha! i am kinda kicked about the entire bitter gourd deal! :D

There is an interesting fact, alright. That, all these so called 'relationships' formed on the internet are rather superficial.
Incongruous and 'foolish'(for want of a better word!)
I used to think otherwise, a while ago. But guess I had my way of learning it the hard way!
So long as you get to 'know' the person on the net,its fine.. But tending to believe that it is for real - is nothing but hogwash.
Sooner or later the fictional part of the so-called affection hits you in the face. And trust me, you end up feeling like a fool.
A fool.

I haev felt the difference.
So long as I knew Anshul on the net,I was so amazingly fond of him. When I met him, it was a different feeling! I could 'associate' myself with him..look at him, talk to him, walk with him.. eat with him...
Sounds funny.. but face-2-face communication is uncomparable to any other form of communication!! Its been what, some 5 years now. And now he is one of my so close friends; prolly closer than the ones I met in real life!

Or, well, lets say Laina. I barely knew her before I went with her to Wayanad! We had just exchanged a couple of mails and spoken on fone!! But the two days together, just did the magic! Now I simply love her for the kinda amazing person she is! ALways smiling.. always enthusiastic!

Or be it Suraj.. Knew him on net for a couple of months till I met him. And there was this 'connexion' then.I mean, he is no more a chat id or a mail id. But yeah.. I know him for real!!

But things with Abdul were not how they-should-have-been!
I was fantasizing.
I was wrong in my understanding of him. So bloody wrong!
And I so detest the very thought of the wasted time in that fictional relationship!!
Things seemed good while we had it. But I am sure, I'm better without it,,

..coz we never met...

Well,so long..

bckgrnd - "I live my life for you - Firehouse"
/me - +

2006-05-31T14:08:00.000+07:00

hehe. ok, the anticlimax was - that I dint get thru the next round! *Sigh*..
nevertheless, it was quite an experience! :)..

Yesterday, I met up with Shalini.. She was travelling from Coimbatore to Pune.. on her way to the new college! The train stops at Bangalore station for 20 mins, and there stood my chance of seeing her..:(
It was quite a sentimental situation. I mean, yeah, I am talking about it like a story now.. but yesterday, I wasnt quite aware of what was happening to me... It was a weird sorta feeling.. When I hugged her, one last time, before she got into the train.. I could feel tears rolling down my cheeks..
I tried to fight that feeling.. but it just wouldnt go! I relented to it.
A kinda sensation, that I havent felt for a while now...like a part of me was going.. felt so stolen away.. :(

I miss her.
A lot!
In every single little thing I do!! We had a world of our own.. And now everything looks shattered.. or well, so I think.. *sigh*

People come and go.. but life goes on..
You feel angry.. you scream, you shout, you niggle, you hate people for doing "it" to you, you hate yourself for loving them so much... but then you yield to it.
You yield to what life has given you.. or rather thrown at you..

I thought I was cool, when it comes to handling people and relationships.
I was SO bloody wrong!!
I slump at it BIGtime. Neither do I let go, nor do I want them to come bck!
Shit! I am feeling so messed up right now.
To hell with everything!

bckgrnd - nil
/me -

The Indian Idol in making!!! haha!

2006-05-25T13:32:00.000+07:00

Ha! Ha! Ha!
Guess what! I got selected for the second round of that singing competition! And now if I pass the 2nd round, I get to perform Live with Debojit, Vineet, Himani (and other blah blah winners of Saregamapa) in Palace Grounds on June 3rd!!!! Yay!!!!

am excited to the CORE!!! :)
Wish me luck!
The second round is tomorrow!

bckgrnd - nil
/me -

:-)

2006-05-24T16:42:00.000+07:00

Just came back from an awesome lunch! Hari, Sajay and me went out to a far away place called 'sree krishna cafe' today! They serve amazing food!! simply amazing! :)
Nice climate.. cool breeze.. mallu songs in the car.. and a long drive...
what more can one ask for during a day when you have zilch work! :D

I am gonna take part in a singing competition tomorrow! hehe.. for fun!! :)
Yay! Am excited!! :D
Alright! But I am still thinking which song to sing!

Let me see!!

bckgrnd - "Boondein - Silk Route"
/me -

Rise and Falls in life!! :D

2006-05-22T19:56:00.000+07:00

Been a crazy day! Loads of unrealistic work and oodles of funny things happening at the same time! hehe..

My new house is essentially the 2nd floor of a house.. and on the first floor some 4 guys stay. As per the Law of "Minimum-interaction-else-You'll-invite-trouble" (suggested by Shalini long ago!) , its been close to 2 months now, but I've never even 'seen' those guys! Leave apart talking to them!

So today morning, while I was descending downstairs to get to office, I was in one great mood! chumma! And I was loudly humming this awesome song by Dream Theater called "Surrounded" ..

/me (singing aloud and jumping two steps at a time) - "I know it's eeeeezzzeeear to walk awayyyyyyyyy.... (jump jump) than look it in the eyeeeeee!" (jump jump)

and jump, skid(!!)..and I trip over, baNG,, THUD!!!! ($%^$%&%^#$)

After 10 seconds.
I am on the floor. Lying flat! and the last words of the song still echoing in the air!!

Hahahahahaha! I laughed at myself and tried to get up, when I hear - "But I will raise a shelter to the sky...and here beneath this star tonight I lie!! - followed by a laughter! I look up and I see this guy, derisively completing the next few lines of the song for me!!!

Oh shit! Now my face turned all red!! (Or so I think! :D)

I made an attempt to get up, cursing the water on the stairs. In the meanwhile, this chap is done with all his attempts to mock me, and he now turns around to help me get up.
But the "I-can-manage-it" spirit in me, dint let him do much! ;)

chap(vaguely trying to smile) - You should be careful.
me(subtly scorning) - Yeah, I know.
chap - You are okay?
me(dusting my clothes) - Yeah, I am fine. You like DT, is it? Remembering all lines and all, huh? (Bleddy showoff!!)
chap - Not much! I have just heard a coupla songs. Btw, We hear your song every morning ! (and then he started laughing as if he cracked the best joke in the world! duh!!)
me(embarrassed) - Oh! (Hmm).. yeah.. I just .. (well.. uhh).. am a lil loud..

By this time, this chap is thoroughly enjoying his own stupid joke and is giggling non-stop.

me(looking around to make sure no one else was looking) -Ok, anyways, See you!
chap(smiling) - Yes! have a nice day!
me (murmuring) - Yes I will!! You jerk!!

He went inside, while I rushed down only hoping that I dont get stuck with the cheeky gang(as I would call them from now) any further! *sigh*

bckgrnd - "Meter Down - Taxi no. 9211"
/me -

2006-05-18T15:51:00.000+07:00

"The central part of my own life is my death. After a while,it will all come to nothing. Whenever I have the courage to face this, my priorities become clear. At such times nothing is done in order to achieve something else. No energy is wasted on maintaining the illusions. My image does not matter, I do not worry about how I am doing. I do what I do, am what I am. That's it. The imminence of my own death is the pivot around which things turn. This makes what is going on now all that counts."

"All relationships are temporary. It's so terribly hard to remember that we have so little time. We stall, kid ourselves, promise that we will deal with things some time soon. Not only are there many things that we never get around dealing with, but even when we do, there is so damn much waste in the process, so much unnecessary distance between ourselves and those with whom we try to make a life."

- Sheldon B. Koop
-------
I want to get this book called - "If you meet Buddha on the road, kill him!" Its by this dude called Sheldon B. Koop. I've read its reviews. It would be quite a read. *sigh*
I just want it. Want it. Want it! :(
But I have no money on me.
I cant complain much, coz just last Sunday, I bought 3 books from Oxford on Global Terrorism , Corruption and Who wants Democracy and spent an amount, I shouldnt have spent, considering the present economic situation.
No, it wasnt an impulsive purchase. It was well-thought upon!

But, still! What the!!!?!?

bckgrnd - "Californication" - Red Hot Chilli Peppers
/me -

2006-05-11T18:41:00.000+07:00

You know, I am just quite excited today! For one, coz I have been getting drenched in the rain for the past two days! Its such an awesaaaaaaam thing!! Man! I shud be investing in some property in Cherrapunji! No, serious! :D

My maid gave me a scorning silent look today morning, to see all those clothes smeared in mud! I pretended like I dint see her reaction.

For two, coz I made friends with this really cute thing called Elwin. Man! He is one helluva crazy guy! But sweet, nevertheless! Although he'd call himself the "mean-green-slime-machine"! hehe/..

Life's beginning to become betterer!! I'm excited about the new office we are going to shift to. WIll be some experience! Went and checked out my new place today.. Its next to this HUGE HUGE , I mean really huge glass window with lots of greenery outside! I almost fainted to see Santa-Destiny-Claus with the goodies for once!

bckgrnd - "Don't Know What You've Got (till It's Gone)" - Cinderella
/me -

Malam-PUZHA! :D

2006-05-10T14:36:00.000+07:00

Conversation yesternight between me and my wud be brother-in-law's brother :)
-------------
*trin trin*

me - Hey Prasad! Man!!Congrats!!
Prasad - Hey! Yeah, thanks thanks!!

me - So! How did it all happen so fast? Mom just told me today that you are getting engaged!
P(smiling gleefully) - Yes, I am still in Palakkad. Heading back to Chennai now.

me - Oh! You're on roaming? Should I call you later or something?
P - Nah, its fine! I hv been waiting to discuss about it with someone! So, ask ask!

me(eyes popped out) - Bloody!! Whats gotten into you!? Getting full excited , is it?
P - Ofcourse! Initially I thought I wouldnt marry now.. only after my US trip.. But ever since I saw her, I am thinking of postponing my trip!

me - Lol!! Lol!! So did you guys go on some bigtime date in the kerala farms? *wink*
P - Nah.. not much.. we were just alone for 5-10 minutes.. She hardly talked, and I was busy staring at her long hair.. She looked so impeccable that if I'd have drawn a circle around her, she'd not have moved out of it!!

me - what a bizzare analogy!! lol!! Ok, tell me more about her!
P - *sigh* I dont know. She is tall and fair. She is studying in Malampuzha. Her family possesses a cute labrador. Thats all.

me - What!!?! Are you kidding? You said a Yes, is it? Whatever happened to your long list of expectations from your would-be wife? Shrunk down to the labrador? God! Prasad!! lol
P - What to do Suggie. Life's like that. Just when you think its going one way, it gives you a jerk, and takes it another way! I think I am okay with her. Big deal!! *sigh*

me - Hmm! For a child of your age, thats a LOT of philosophy!! hehe.. So, whenz the engagement?
P - July sometime.. You'll be free right..?

me - I'll make myself free, dontcha worry! WHere's it gonna be/?
P - In Malampuzha only.. her native.

me - Malam-who?
P - Malampuzha!! puzha!! PUZHA!! Ok, forget it!

me - Cool! Shalini got me a set-mundu last month! I am excited that I am finally gonna wear it now! Does yuor girl understand Hindi?
P - I dont think so. She is born and brought up in Kerala.. So...

me - Aiyyo!! Ok, so she is the typical mallu homely gurl with coconut oil and pookkal in her hair, is it? :) *wink*
P - Shut up now, will u? I am gonna change all that of hers!

me - Lol, Lol!! Ok ok! chill! chalo, will catch up later.. congrats again!!
-----------

Hehe.. I am excited!! :) Some marriage happening in my good 'ol family!! :)

bckgrnd - Tequila Sunrise - Eagles
/me -

Why doesnt it rain for christ sake!! x-(

2006-05-05T16:59:00.000+07:00

I was wondering, why hasnt it rained for so long now..
I want to jump in those mud puddles and get soaked in the rain... and to hear it pattering on the leaves of the trees outside... :(

For some reason, I am not feeling too great. Feeling alone. Feeling left out.
I want it to rain. Rain really heavily. So much that it blinds my vision. So much that I am not able to see where I am going. So much that it becomes sick.

You know what?
I hate some people. I hate them so much that it hurts, everytime I think of being associated with them, ever!
Does God exist? Does he condemn people for being reckless and act like cheap mean bastards?

I dont care.

I just want it to rain and give me some company. duh!!

bckgrnd - "Aashayein - Iqbal'
/me -

and life goes on...

2006-05-03T16:54:00.000+07:00

Its a whole new life..
New house.. new room mate.. new lifestyle.. a changed outlook ever since I came back from my trip.
Today morning, I woke up a lil early.. heard the birds chirping outside my window and sun's first rays peeping in. I went outside and sat in my "oh-so-awesome" cane swing.. Gentle cold breeze was blowing on my face.. and I was blank in my mind..until I noticed a squirrel hopping on the trees infront..

Thats the best thing I like about my new house.. that all rooms are so nicely ventilated! I have two huge windows in my room.. There is no need for any tubelights all throughout the day. The same is true for other rooms as well..
And there is this huge unused backyard of a house right opposite mine.. where lots of green plants and big green trees are sitting, plus some pet hens..birds and a lot of squirrels!

It is good... just that I miss Shalini in everything I do... :(
but then.. wise men say, that life will go on.. with or without her... *sigh*

bckgrnd - 'Pal' - KK
/me -

Am back!! :)

2006-04-25T21:08:00.000+07:00

Whoa! Look who's here!! :)

I had such an amazing time during my trip, that its not funny!!
No, really!
I had decided that it would be a complete break from everything I do in Bangalore.. And so I did not touch the computer from 7th to 25th April! My mom actually freaked out to see my revulsion towards the comp at home. She was glad, nevertheless!

Yes yes. lots of interesting things happened.. As usual, an entire gamut of events..er.. adventurous events unfolded..
Had fun in Mumbai for the first 4 days. Went to disc.. And man! You got no idea as to how I denied a drink there... and that too when it was my only best friend's birthday!!
Its a REAL BIG thing!!
Am so proud of my resolution...
Ah!! I am so proud of myself!!! And what are you doing sitting in that dumb chair of yours!
You might just want to stand up and give me a standing applause for resisting that God damn tequila shot!! hehe..

Mumbai was fun! Apart from the constant rebukes that re-emphasized that I have become quieter than what I was when they last saw me! *sigh*

Then it was Delhi!!! Yo baby!!
I get a rush of blood everytime I think of Delhi! Yeah! I am not kidding! :)
Met up with a friend, and then we went to Rishikesh from there.. was nice! really nice!

Then went to Kanpur from there!
Mom-Dad and a cousin and uncle-aunt and a distant relative + one would-be relative --> all had come to pick me at the station!!
I think other than the milkman and the washerwoman, we can count everyone in! :D
And not just this! They'd gotten one huge garland of flowers to welcome me and a few roses!
ayyo!! and while Mom was putting it round my neck..much to my embarrassment, rest everyone was humming some musical tune in a rhythmic fashion unitedly!!
Everyone on tht stupid lil station was turning back and looking at the live show of "Come-hit-me"!!
God! I am not surprised to see myself the way I am.. I now know where I derive my craziness from! hehe..

Everything went fine.. till I landed here today morning.. and lost my bag at the Bangalore airport!
I went crazy.. really! Felt total shit.. Looked like the world had come to an end.. but I have now become pretty good at handling myself! So, it all seems fine now..

:)

Hope all's well with all my "ardent readers" .. hehe.. and thanx for patiently checking the blog every single day!!

bckgrnd - "no key for the drawer - so no headfones!"
/me - Chill!

chronicles of my swimming classes!

2006-03-27T11:41:00.000+07:00

Ok! so it goes, that I am doomed!
My swimming coach is barbarous and vindictive!!! He secretly wants to kill me! He is a hired criminal! He has resolved to drown 500 people and I'm sure he was on 499 this morning!
:(

I am going to put posters with his picture all over Bangalore, so that people are beware of him..I am telling ya! He is quite insane!
I dont know how and why I get stuck with all sorts of weird people everytime!

Arrey! There's a way of teaching how to swim! He fuckin' just keeps pushing me in the pool, as if I'm scared.. OK, may be I am..but still.. hehe..
Everytime someone else will go across the pool, he'd not say a word and will watch silently, as if someone just pulled his tongue out from his mouth! But the moment 'I' start going ( and I'll be all chill and all, ok!) he jumps and comes at my end..and gives me all sorts of instructions! I mean, I understand things if told once! He doesnt have to repeat it 15 times! And I get conscious then, thinking tht I might be doing something wrong!

Then he'd keep yapping - 'keep kicking, keep kicking! cmon sugandh! u can do it!'
I mean, whats the god damn hue & cry about man! Just chill! It aint any Olympics or something, that he has to get so hyper!
On the 1st day, when I'd entered the expert zone by mistake, he did not come to save me despite my helpless screams and forlorn yelling! So, how can I trust him NOW!
He'd keep saying - "Dont worry, what are you scared of baby? I am there na! "

Like, duh??! "HE" is there, and thats my biggest concern! And hello?? Me aint any baby!!!
Idiot.

God damn it! May be his grandfather did something 50 years ago, which he is angry about, but thats not MY problem! Why's he getting mad at ME! Bloody fatso! huh..

God save me! When will the 15 days get over!

bckgrnd - "Thats the way it is - Celine Dion"
/me -

but i cant help...

2006-03-24T18:42:00.000+07:00

falling in love with you...

shall i stay? shall i say?
would it be a sin,
if i , i can't help
falling in love with you?

like a river flows, surely to the sea.
darling so it goes, somethings are meant to be..

/me -

whatever!

2006-03-20T19:31:00.000+07:00

there was one big anti climax to my painting-adventure!
watever!! let me explain.

saturday morning - i am all set to go fetch the paint and all. I call up my landlord so that he can come over and we can buy the right colour.
He sounded all sweet and nice.

[saturday]
me(walking up-n-down in the balcony) - hello anil, good morning! we are all set. are you coming over?
anil - hello! actually i hv another idea.. if i may propose that....?
me - yeah, sure! tell me.
anil - actually, i was thinking yesterday that for this current place i can get 6500 to 7000 easily.
me(looking at a cow on the road) - hmm.. you're not too wrong.
anil - and you're paying me just 5250/-
me(looking at the cow peeing) - that is ALSO true!
anil - So, how about vacating the place? I dont want to run a loss you know!
me - :-o (silent)
anil - hello?
me - (what a f***face!)
[/saturday]

So tht was it.
I was back to square one!!

the whole of sunday I kept on looking for places left-right and center!! Finally found a really nice place right behind TGIF on airport road! Moving in with rachita (bitsian friend). its a brand new house.. and we'll be the first occupants.. so everything looks nice and new, and polished and shining.! :D
And the best part about the house is that the main hall has one wall orange and the others yellow, with green doors! I loved it! yeah! you read it right!! Orange wall!!
and theres a nice sit out - where i am gonna put a cane swing! just like the one I hv at home in kanpur..

shifting by next week..

Ok! Not so bad, eh??! (the swing part is making me feel better!)

bckgrnd - "Linkin Park - Numb"
/me -

painto-the-delighto!

2006-03-17T16:58:00.000+07:00

OK! I am super excited! :)
Guess what! I am going to paint my house this weekend! It'd be fun! I have called Shekhar(IBM postman) for help. He'd get the ladder and all..
I hv spoken to the paints shop guy..and to the landlord.

Its not going to be much.. just 2 rooms.. kitchen.. bathrooms..and here and there..
I might get tored.. but I'll see. [tored = bored + tired] :D
Also, looks like I'll hv to postpone my Mysore trip. But since it was meant to be a surprise anyways, its okay!

Yay! :)

backgrnd - "can i touch you there - michael bolton"
/me -

Its Holi!!!!

2006-03-15T15:19:00.000+07:00

Its been fun since morning! I got some colours in office and started putting it to everyone - known and unknown! And slowly people got enthued and then it was one helluva adventure - with ppl running all over the office.. screaming.. saying No, No... laughing.. having fun!!
We have decided not to wash off the colours throughout the day.. :)

Happy Holi guys!!! I soooo love this festival!!! :)

Thats Naiju, Babitha, Anjana and me in the cafeteria :)

bckgrnd - Two steps behind - Def Leppard
/me -

the ill-bill

2006-03-14T15:21:00.000+07:00

OK! /me is ill today :(
got fever and sore throat.. came to office to take the conf call..
and whoa! i see one long list of releases due this week.. and which need immediate attention :(
to hell with the releases!

i am worried if i'll be fine till the weekend.. i gotta go to mysore n surprise rachit..
uh uh uh!!! hmph!! i want to go..pray the fever goes down..and i get well by then..

/me pouts

bckgrnd - shayad yehi to pyar hai - lucky (i louuu this song!)
/me -

tada! :)

2006-03-13T16:32:00.000+07:00

Life's goooood! And /me is jappy-happy! For no reason! :)

Things I am going to do for the coming week -
- Not talk to Kinshuk, for reasons of cutting down on the phone bill!
- Start going for my swimming classes!
- Document all my important discussions with Hanseu Park(my significant other in the US ;)) during the Conference calls!
- Just take a chill-pill and spend maximum time at home with Shalini! :)
-Get back to my "Learn tamil in 40 days" book. Need to communicate with ma maid after Shalini leaves!
- Give a surprise visit to Rachit in Mysore on the weekend!! *cant believe he is gettin married!!!*

Not bad, eh!! :)

bckgrnd - Madonna - "Sorry"
/me -

Just a thought..

2006-03-10T17:44:00.000+07:00

Watched '15Park Avenue' last night on Nitin's laptop..Dont know where the Bongs derive all their talent from! A very well made movie - I must say!
And as I lay in my bed..err couch.. (ok, the bed was granted to Nitin on the lines of 'Atithi Devo Bhava' :D).. I started my all time fav job - diggin' old graves n thinking!! :D [I knew what you thot ;)]

[thinking]
Let go! Just let go!
All my life, I hv been clinging on to things.. clinging on to friends.. clinging on to relationships..clinging on to my job.. to security..to the ambition of being an MBA..to all tht 'looks' good! But its all transient.. It will fade away..I always keep wanting more.. Theres no end..
I sometimes think tht my mind is not free.. I hv reservations..I hv desires..
Have I ever tried saying - "I want nothing." ?? Have I ever tried being desireless?
Guruji says, "Desire means the present is not sufficient enough; its not okay the way it is now, this moment. Desire means projection to the next moment. Desire simply means being unaware of the Infinity. Desire simply means you dont know yourself."

I gather, tht its not like I shudnt desire..Desires shud arise..and if they arise, its okay! But hankering to fulfill them, thinking tht when they are fulfilled only then things will happen - "only then I'll be happy" - THAT is an illusion :(

I hv not accepted enough.
[/thinking]

Phone rings.
Who the hell is calling me at 2 in the night! And heck! Its a landline!!

me(almost whispering) - hello..
*silence*
me(slightly raising my voice) - hello??
*silence* Although I could hear a dog barking in the backgrnd..
me(getting impatient) - dude! Its not the best of the times for you to be cracking a joke! whos this??
At this I heard a harsh manly voice clearing his throat..
"Yaaro?? Avalu iddala??" (means Who are you? Is she there? In kannada)
And he was sooo fuckin loud tht I almost thought I'd create a world record by being the only person who had a heart attack due to loud noise!!!

me(smiling to myself) - Wrong number, anna! Good night :)
"Oh! Sorry amma..(after a pause) Good night."

he he...we hung up.. and I took it as a sign to stop thinking and go to sleep! :)
:ZZZzzzz.. :)

bckgrnd - nil (Prit has borrowed ma headfones)
/me - kinda

2006-03-06T14:09:00.000+07:00

Have been looking around for houses for the past 2-3 days..nothing's clicking..
May be I am not looking enough.. may be deep within, I dont want to leave my current place..
May be theres something else in store for me..
Got a really nice one on saturday.. just the perfect place I'd imagined..
Thought I'd call up the owner and confirm the deal..but just as I was about to dial her no., an old friend called up, and I got chatting with him for about half an hour..and the deal was gone in this much time :) Someone else called up 15 min before me & confirmed it :D

Frankly, its certainly not one of the best things to do - looking for houses..!
There was this place I saw with the agent, which was ridiculous! Reallly! It was stinking.. had rats running all over the place.. the walls were painted in an insane red-pink colour, the fan was making the kinda noise u hear when u see a train passing at the signal..it was in this narrow lane, wherein the neighbours were popping their heads out and staring, like they had just seen an alien from Mars! The best deal was, tht one of the two rooms had walls made of glass!!!
I hv absolutely no idea what the owner had in mind while making tht house!! :))

I looked at the agent in anger, and he looked away.. Then I quietly said,
"Raghavendra, we are not exactly in the mood to waste time, are we?"
He humbly said - "No madam, its not like tht madam, I'm sorry madam.. I dint know it was tht bad!"
He sounded so paavam, tht I burst out laughing, and he felt quite embarrassed!
We came out.. and I was thrilled to see tht it was drizzling! Man! Nothing like getting wet in the rain! :)
So I was enjoying and waiting for Raghavndra to start his bike.. when I saw this really old man, all clad in rags..with a torn blanket..sleeping on the street..
His face looked glum..and he was all clumsily rolled up..

Dont know.. something struck me somewhere. Here he was who doesnt hv a place to stay..is generalyl lying here and there.. and here I am, who has seen some 15 places, but cant find even one of them worth living!
Seeing him, dont know what happened..but I suddenly became aware.. tht I'm going to die one day..
Nothing will stay.. I will be old one day, I will suffer all old-age problems.. I will be unable to jump around.. I will be dependent on my kids to take me around..
Yes, there will be one such day.. after 40 years, 50 years, 60 years?
But I'll die..

Dont know, I suddenly felt so weird.. tht I told Raghavendra, tht we'll call it a day..
Went to Cha Bar, Leela(my favvvourite place) and sat there..trying to read a book..sipping a cup of hot tea( yeah, I broke ma resolution :( )

but nothing fell in place..

Came back, and called up a couple of old friends whom I had not spoken to, for months now..

but nothing fell in place..

bckgrnd - nil
/me -

Bitter Sweet Symphony! :)

2006-03-03T14:14:00.000+07:00

Lots of things have happened..and I am absolutely kicked about some , and awefully distressed about others! hehe..:D
What a stupid beginning! duh!!

Well, basically, over the years I've realized one thing for sure! That nothing lasts! Nothing ever lasts! SO even if its something causing great misery, chances are tht either you'll grow out of it, or it'll become all fine one day.
So if you look at it - you are always in a Win-Win situation! :D
But still we keep cribbing!

I hv not written for quite sometime.. and now it seems I am running out of words to use! I think I shud start chatting with people, to enhance my online ready-to-use vocabulary! ;)

Ok, first the four things tht happened in the past one week, tht I am really really happy about! :)

- After a lot of running around, and calling up people and convincing them, I finally got involved with The Akshara FOundation! :) (Its an NGO which works for the education of poor children)

- Found out about the weekly Satsang in a nearby place with the Art of Living group.. which means I can enjoy the Satsang + follow up session of Sudarshan Kriya without going to the Ashram every week! :)

- Got myself enrolled for swimming classes which begin from next week!! Yuhoo! :)
My age old dream of learning how to swim!

- Last but not the least, www.patchup.com happened with a good ol' friend :)

And now the 2 not-so-happy things!

- Shalini is leaving bangalore, which means I am gonna miss her like crazy.. :(
We hv been staying together for 2 yrs now in blore.. and before tht 4 years in college.. its been quite a long journey..
Ok, I am not going to talk about it.

- My present house is such an awesome place, and I dont wanna leave it! But it'll turn out very expensive for a single person! And I cannot even think of staying with someone else now!!
So I am in freakin two mindS!!! :D

Well, thats life!! Bitter sweet! :)

bckgrnd - "The Verve - Bitter Sweet Symphony"
/me -

One night @Pondicherry :)

2006-02-27T17:35:00.000+07:00

Saturday Evening. 6:30pm. Phone rings. Its Bikram.

me (picking up) - Hey Bikram!
Bikram - Hey Sug! how're u?
me - Am doin good! Wats up with ya!
Bikram - Yeah..all's well. What are you doing? What plans?
me - Nuthing great as such. I was getting ready to go for the Satsang.
(thinking) Looks like he and Roshith want to meet up for coffee/dinner.
Bikram - hmmm.. is it mandatory to go there?
me - Nah.. not mandatory. But I want to go.
Bikram - Oh..
me - Wats up?
Bikram - No nothing. Roshith and me were wondering if you'd like to join us for the evening. We are planning to drive down to Pondicherry.
me - Oh! great plan. When are we leaving?
Bikram - 7.30pm. We come back Monday Morning.
me - Cool! Lemme ask Shalini, Will call you back in 2 minutes.
Bikram - Sure! Donn make it late. We leave 7.30 pm for sure.
me - Yup!

Calling Shalini.

me - Hey! How abt Bikram, Roshith, S ohini, you and me driving down to Pondi for a day? Come back Monday morning.
Shal - Ummm....
me - Come on!
Shal - okay! :)

So we are all set.. We dumped in a few things in the bag.. and all set to go!

It was good fun! Like some school picnic, we sang songs.. played games.. talked and chilled out on the way! Reached there at some 3am.
Then in the morning.. Shalini and me went for some window shopping here and there.. sat on the rocks near the beach and talked..took leisurely walks by the sea.. took lift by some local man on his kinetic when we got lost..Visited the Aurobindo Ashram.. Went to the Chunnambar river for boating, had lavish lunch.. visited Roshith's parents..met Sohini's uncle-aunt.. bought cheap booze..Started frm there at 1am.... :)

Whoa! Thats what is called an eventful day! :D

bckgrnd - But It Rained - Parikrama
/me -

2006-02-23T17:47:00.000+07:00

hehe.. today has been funny! on my way to the office my sandal broke..i dint particularly wanted to go back and change.. so i decided to just have some fun! :)
so i held my footwear in one hand.. and climbed the bus..got down and walked on the road.. walked uptil lift and came to the office! Shit it was hilarious - the way ppl were looking! :)

all throughout the day, i hv been moving in office without footwear.. its quite nice actually! :)

got no work in office for quite sometime now..been doing some timepass..

/me -
bckgrnd - Genesis ( Old Testament)

Day 2 at wayanad :)

2006-02-21T19:49:00.000+07:00

Ok, So day 2 at wayanad was pretty enthralling too!

In that isolated weird place, we visit an equally deserted place called the
'the soochippara waterfalls'.. we took some bus which dropped us at some place X (I forgot its name) From there, we were supposed to walk down some huge distance to reach the waterfall place.. The roads were kinda funny with an uphill-downhill, bent-not bent kinda structure! it was slightly uncomfortable walking down those roads! But we were as usual having helluva fun - clicking pictures, talking.. looking around.. it was nice.

So, we are both goin down.. and we suddenly notice this unconstructed hut in the otherwise deserted area...So, we stopped by and asked them how far the waterfalls were.. that chap smiled at us, and told us some phone number in malayalam - and asked us to call at tht no. incase we needed help! :D. The number was - randae puujyamm muunnae onnae naalae ezhae!

We walked and walked.. and walked.. in the sun, and finally reached the place after some 1.5 hours.. Here we met one cucmber man.. and since we were running out of water, we did some bit of time pass at his place.. eating cucumbers, raw mango and pineapple :)
We had to trek down a lil to finally reach the much coveted waterfalls..
Now, I was one of those utterly unfortunate people, who hv never seen a waterfall in their whole life! So for me, even a small stream of water falling from somewhere is quite a sight! In such a situation, when I saw soochipaara (which Laina kept saying was like an ant infront of other Kerala falls) I almost fainted!!
I was so thrilled, its beyond words!! If you look at it, it is simple water falling in an uneven fashion coz its got nothing better to do! But the bloody kick tht you get sitting under one such thing is amazing!

So, we both are just sitting around.. under the waterfall..and thanking the
Lords for the serene silent place..and thats when we notice a huge gang..
and someone waving at me ridiculously! I was like - eh? who the hell is
tht??

And guess what! Tht was Rachit!!! Good lords! We studied in school together and I hadnt met him for abt an year now. Had no idea where he was and this was one phenomenally surprising place to bump into each other!! :)

I was thrilled to see him.. He'd come there with his office gang.. for team
outing..
Laina and me then decided to join their gang.. considering we werent too keen on walking back 10 kms again for the bus stop! In their gang there was some chap who was Laina's college senior..Suraj's batch.. and so it was overall not so bad!

We all went for lunch.. where we heard interesting stories abt Renjith J! Apparently, he was part of the team , but cudnt come coz he was ill.. Next on the list was this place called eddakal caves.

Man! The trek-cum-rock climbing route to Edakkal caves was no less than a road to perdition! It was very steep! And I was bloody tired! You step on from one rock to another which would be some 4 feet high! You cannot stop and gasp for breath.. coz theres no place to stand.. you cannot go down, coz people are coming behind you,, You cannot go further up coz you'd run out of all the oxygen reserves!! It was hell! really! As in, I generally dont run outta stamina.. but while we were just nearing the peak .. I almost had a black-out, and I was sure, tht if I was destined to accidental death , this will be it. :D . And the worst part was that since you can see the peak when you lift your head, you cannot step back! Theres tht motivation.. that yeah, I gotta reach there!

But, finally, we did reach the peak, after tht horrible trek of abt 2 hours!
ALl of us sat around,,and talked.. then trekking down was fun.. it took us half the time..

We had to now get back to our hotel.. coz it was getting dark..
So we say a Bye to these guys..and decide to walk down..
we walk.. walk.. walk.. but not a sign of any bus stop.. it was getting dark.. and the road dint seem to end.. Tht was the first time we got a bit scared,, and both of us looked at each other with apprehension..tht what the hell we are doin! It was dead silent, and huge trees on either side of the road was like an icing to the deadly road!

Damn! We walked and walked.. and then we saw this jeep in the middle of the road..
There were two men and two kids sitting in tht jeep.. We sure hesitated for a while.. coz they looked the slimiest of men, Ever! But we dint hv an option.. and asked them where was the bus stop and more importantly, if we wud get a bus from there to sultan bathery.
They looked at us, and said, they cud drop us at the kalpetta-sultan bathery junction, considering they were going in the same direction..
Laina and me looked at each other.. I was very very skeptical.. and was about to say "No thanks".. When I saw Laina, getting into the jeep..
Hehe! Tht kinda rocked!! You know sometimes, in life you are looking for tht unsaid affirmation.. and its nice when you get it.. :)

So this chap dropped us half way and refused to take any money from us. He just insisted, tht we should tk care and get back safe..
From there some kind lady told us how to get a bus to kalpetta..the bus conductor was another dude! He looked like some university professor.. with a crisp check shirt.. neatly tucked in.. and wearing glasses.. and talking in full english accent! He really looked like the kinds who'd just tell you to take out ur books and start taking notes! :D

We got back to the hotel safely.. and our bus was at midnight.. The hotel man sent the security with us, to make sure we boarded safely.. The bus was 45 min late.. and tht security chap(an old man) stood there with us all throughout..

Overall, the experience was nice.. just very nice.
It does get unbelievable at times, when you look at all the niceness of the people.. But I have always believed, tht you get what you give. And there is always a certain amount of trust tht one should and one must imbibe in the other person.. theres no point living in a cocoon.. If you're wrong in yer judgement of the person, it'll hit you back - thts 4 sure. But then it'll only make you strong..Its not wrong..
Its always good to learn the hard way.. :)

*sigh* I promise not to write such a long post again!! :)

Pictures for 2nd day - Here :)

Day 1 at wayanad :)

2006-02-16T23:14:00.000+07:00

Although I dont think I will be able to justify the ammmmazzzzing time I had with Laina in Wayanad in words.. I will still give it a shot! :D

SO we start from here on Friday night..and reach Kalpetta at 4:30 in the morning. It was still dark. The bus dropped us at some place where seemimgly drunken men were joblessly sitting all around..and the silence was kinda terrifying! we cud see a tea-shop in a distance..
We jumped out of the bus and I took a deep breath in the Wayanad air..something tht I had wanted for so long! :D

I turned around.. and we both smiled. Yes, we finally are here!

We called up the Hotel ppl( We had done prior booking in woodlands Hotel) and asked them where they were located. They gave us directions.. and after a 5min walk we could spot a watchman standing in the middle of the road. He stared at us and we stared back.
I uttered - "Umm.. Woodland Hotel?"
He nodded and started walking..We followed him. We soon saw a huge brightly lit board of the hotel.
He lead us in.
A sleepy but seemimgly nice chap welcomed us at the counter. He wore a blazer which probably would hv fitted his grandfather before dieting. He gave us the keys and we went to the room, watched the TV for sometime.. and then slept off..
There was nothing creepy abt this place and we felt pretty safe. Frankly, this hotel was perhaps one of the best things tht happened to us in the whole trip.

It was good fun overall! Met lots of interesting people.. travelled in local buses.. ate at random
places.. Knew wht it is like, to have a life where you can choose what to do..where to go..*sigh*

Met different kinda people..
1. the woman in the Hotel lobby whom we stopped for clicking a pic for us..

woman - ningal college students aano?
we - nah.. we are working in bangalore.. woman - oooh!!

hehe.. her look of bewilderment and how she looked at us from top to bottom..althought i dint really hv any age complex till now..it sure feels good when someone thinks you look way too young! :D

2. the hotel man..sudhir.. who kept contradicting himself everytime we would ask him for directions..
i think he realised it too... and decided to draw a map for us instead.. which was unequivocally
incorrect!
hehe.. he thought we were some high society russian women! he told us where to get the bus for meppadi.. and as we turned around, he prompted us..

he - umm,, well.. i'd like to tell you, tht everything will be written in malayalam. So...
and then he looked upset..
laina(smirking back) - yeah rrright!! eniku nalla pole ariya!! :)) he - ohh...

3. The woman on the bus stand who smiled excessively.. or tht pan shop guy who struggled to keep his eyes off his feet..or the bakery shop dude whose geography teacher would certainly kiss him for his knowledge!

after asking all over around.. we somehow took some bus and reached meppadi..

4. the hotel guy at meppadi.. who gasped in amazement when he learnt tht it was just the two of us who were going to trek to chembra peak..

man - randu kutti-gallo?
we - yo! :)
man - ayyo!! entha ingane pone!?? this was in such a sympathetic and concerned voice tht i almost thought i shed a tear at his concern..:D

he was nice.. he called a man and asked him to get the 'trusted auto man'..

man - nammal ariyane auto karane vilikyane!
and then he turned to us and said - tirichu varumbol evidanu bakshanam kazhikyane..!! (hv lunch with us when u come back from the trek)

the auto man arrived in a while.. he looked soooo paavam.. looked like someone had just slapped him :D. the hotel man told him to take us to the forest office and get the permission for trekking and then drop us 8 kms to the place where the trek began..and take not more than 60 bucks,.. he nodded obediently.

5. the paavam auto man who took us to the forest office.. but no one was there.. he dint give up, and took us to the quarters of the officers to make sure we got the permission... we were pretty chill all this while.. and clicking pictures everywhere!
finally one lady comes out of the house.. and gave us forms etc to fill.. she was sweet.. and was
amazed to see tht we were not hiring any guide to take us up the trek...:) she told us to taek care and be safe..

the auto man then took us some 8kms from there.. this was helluva isolated hilly road..peripherised by beautiful tea estates... not a soul to be seen anywhere,, we were enthusiastically clicking pictures everywhere.. adn stopping the auto man every 5min to click pics!! :)

6. we reach teh base of the peak.. and see some 4-5 absolutely sidee men standing there.. who were obviosuly staring slyly!! *phew*.. as Laina's explanation goes.. *they looked bored of their lives and were staring for some change* rofl!! :)
so we get out of the auto.. and one man jumps and makes himself available for any conversation..
we asked him where the trek began from..

man - yeah.. its right there.. towards the left.my name is zuber..and yeah..how are you plannin to go back these 8kms after the trekking.
we said we dont know.. and tht was not our concern at tht pointa time..
man (getting upset) - By the way do you hv network?
i took out my cell.. yeah.. there was no network..
man - hmm.. theres a local phone there..(he pointed to his right).. and this is my phone no. i hv BSNL connexion..you gurls should be back by around 5pm.. i will get an auto for you from meppadi.. but in case you dont see me here.. call me at this no.

we were zapped!! really!

we - thanks.. thanks a lot..
man - do you hv enuf water?
we(examining the bottle) - yeah.. almost half a bottle..
man - what!!! no..this wudnt do! saying this, he snatched the bottle from ma hand,,and leaped across to fill it up..

we started the trek..it was sooooper nice! we trekked trekked.. found our own path..cleared the grass roots to make our ways..when we got tired, we wud stop by.. sit around on the rocks.. and sing songs.. generally talk abt stuff..we were carrying newspapers.. and we had tie up a sheet like a ribbon on the branches of shrubs, at every crossroads.. so tht we find our way back..

Quite brilliantly, Laina and me gelled in pretty well.. she is the sweetest thing.. really! :)
we reached the top in some 2-3 hours.. and yeah..we were dead tired.. but the moment we saw the view from the top.. i dont think i wanted to think abt the fatigue anymore!
we clicked lots of pictures.. and then just lied down on our backs.. and closed our eyes..
there was nothing but just the sound of the wind..it was almost afternoon.. but the breeze was cool.. and caressed our faces.. i smiled.. it was such a beautiful feeling...
you know, silence is something tht has never failed me to amaze me.. so many thngs fall in place, only if we'd shut up and just BE.

we lied there for dunno how much time.. the feeling was just too much to give up..we trekked back..and tht dint take as much time.. ma shoes kept slipping at every steep edge.. and Laina kept making fun o' me.. njaan paavam :( .. she'd click me everytime i'd fall!! :D

we came back..and met soem helpul gardener while looking for Zuber.. this gardener gave us some water to generally wash our faces and freshen up. he kept talking abt bangalore.. and was pretty upset coz we trekked alone.. and we were like - aiyye! wats the big deal!! :P

Zuber appeared in sometime.. and called for an auto..
on the way back... Zuber bhai.. the auto man and we two..got into interesting conversations.. in
general abt kerala.. wayanad.. and somethings here and there..
Zuber bhai had to stop by at his place and change..he invited us for tea/coffee at his house.. but we preferred otherwise.. :)
we tried clicking pictures with his kids.. but they ran away shyly..:D
even the auto man had to stop by at his place on the way.. and pick some stuff.. i was pleased to see tht he lived in 'such' a big house..

so after having all the breaks.. we reach back to meppadi.. where the hotel man greeted us.. and we had a nice lunch with kerala parotha and some coconut veg curry and fish curry respectively..

we called it a day and went back to the hotel..coz it was getting darker..watched tv.. talked till 2 in the night.. and then slept off! :)

*sigh* tht was day no. 1.. putting some pics here..

let me take a break.. will write abt day 2 in the next post :)

going for the AOL Silver Jubilee Celebration from tomorrow onwards!!
i am very very very happy!! :) :)

bckgrnd - "Kid Rock - Only God knows why"
/me -

Going to Wayanad! :)

2006-02-10T17:00:00.000+07:00

Ok! So finally ma dream of visiting Wayanad (Kerala) has come true!
Am leaving today alongwith Laina! Its gonna be one helluva adventure - the best part being tht I hv never met or seen Laina.. I just know her through orkut!! Yeah I know it sounds ridiculous.. but its fun..aint it ? :)
We plan to go trekking up till Chembra peak.. then visit the Pookot lake.. Muthunga Wildlife sanctuary.. soochippara waterfalls and edakkal caves..

We seem to hv made all arrangements.. but still theres a lil anxiety..
particularly, when yesterday Shalini psyched me with all sorts of hypothetical situations!!
What if this happens.. what if tht happens.. :)

hmm.. but I 'll be lying if I say tht I am not excited abt it still!! Whatever has to happen will anyhow find its way..

Lets see how it turns out! Will update on Monday! :)

bckgrnd - 'You're my religion - Firehouse'
/me -

just a matter of time?

2006-02-07T20:41:00.000+07:00

I have always believed tht if God closes one avenue.. he creates several others..

While at school.. I was always competing with Anadi for 1st Rank.. but somehow I always used to miss it by 2-3 marks, and end up coming 2nd...I still clearly remember how stymied I used to feel, when during the award function Anadi used to stand before me in the queue for prize winners..But at the same time, I thought tht may be God has some reason to make me feel this way.. May be he wants me to work harder..And I dint give up..
At the risk of sounding conceited, I was elated when in class 12th Boards, I secured a state rank in CBSE... and I remember, my only concern was tht I had defeated Anadi - finally!

When I went to BITS, the IIT disaster kept ringing in my head.. and I wasnt sure if I had made the best of my decisions to join BITS..But still I was sure tht whatever is happening is certainly
happening for good.. and there is a reason for my being here..
And I certainly do not, in any way regret my degree at BITS now!!

There were lots of incidents in college too.. when I had literally thought tht this is the end of life.. hehe.. I remember what a huge crush I had on Vinod.. and when he dint respond.. I felt like I was ruined! But nah.. I had hope.. tht this is not wht is meant to happen..
And now Vinod is perhaps teh best of my friends.. and whom I adore more than anyone! ANd honestly, I think I like it this way better :)

Time passed.. and I ended up in IBM..
Man! I remember how I was sitting in Institute Cafeteria the day the results were announced and cursing my fate as to why I got IBM, when I had actually wanted Texas Instruments! I was scribbling in ma diary.. and the only thing I wrote was - 'Everything happens for good'..
And yeah.. it was indeed! I ended up in one of the best Microelectronics team here at IBM..with just exactly the kinda work I wanted..and with a manager who is one gem of a person!

Days went by...and I now gave my MBA exams..
Even with a good score in CAT and XAT.. I dint get any calls,..
I have just missed it..I just did... :(
An year's hard work just went unnoticed..
Frankly, in the end its not abt the score..Its all about being on this side of the fence or tht side of it..

Its a ravage. It really is!! Atleast looks like it.
But something within tells me tht this is not the end.. and there is something good in it too.. though I cant figure out what...

O God, where are the other avenues?? Exactly where are they!!! :(

I am beginning to wonder whether its just a matter of time tht we adjust to whatever has happened? or is it tht everything indeed happens for good!?

bckgrnd - 'boulevard of broken dreams - green day'
/me -

Addictions :)

2006-02-01T21:02:00.000+07:00

Someone said - "Eat, Sleep and Be Merry!" Whoa! A lil more emphasis on the first idea, and it should hv been "Eat, Drink and Be Merry"!!

duh! x-(

Now for the flash news!

I hv given up tea, coffee, softdrinks and egg.

Its a 30-day test, alright, and began from 20th Jan. I am not going to touch either of them..
I hv been so god damn addicted to coffee and tea tht I used to consume atleast 10 cups of coffee and 8 cups of tea during a day.. and most of it.. coz I needed a break from my work! I want to abstain myself from it for sometime.. and reach a point wherein I can say a NO to it..

Plus.. Its all Tamsik food.. and I hv decided I can do without it. :)

I am doomed!! Its bloody difficult to abstain yourself from addictions.. but once u do it.. its for the good.. I hv been reminded of this fact a couple of times in various ways.. but I never seem to take my lesson..
Everyone has been making fun of this - right from my Mom..to Shalini.. to Pritish.. to Suraj.. to Ayana ...even the housekeeping boy in office!!

Lets see how far I go !! :)

bckgrnd - 'Halka Halka sa ye nasha! - Chocolate'
/me -

the calvin hobbes shirt guy :)

2006-01-31T15:25:00.000+07:00

Ah well.. life's been good :)
SO much to do.. so much to learn.. so many people to meet.. so much to understand..tht it looks like I hv spent 23 years of my life just contemplating..

AOL course was amazing.. It answered so many of my questions..I am so glad I went..:)
Went there this Sunday too! Just the thrill of going there.. sitting around in Satsang.. helping the Ashram mates in the kitchen.. sitting in silence under a tree..the ambience.. the people..everything is so beautiful..
no loud music.. no traffic.. no people calling endlessly on the phone.. no flashy clothes.. no show off..no rush.. just absolute peace..
Ye know.. I got to spend so much time by myself when I was there.. So many answers, so many ideas.. just fall in place - when we sit by ourselves and meditate :)

Watched 'Rang De Basanti' on 26th Jan! I liked it! Kinda nice.. :). Thanks to Nitin for cleverly procuring the tickets and taking me along...It was good fun!
hehe.. Before the movie.. we were generally hanging out in Crosswords..(thts like my all time favourite place to be doing just abt anything!).. and I noticed this chap who was wearing one Calvin-Hobbes Tshirt!!! Good Lords!! Did you hear that!!!?? A Calvin Hobbes shirt!! I was so excited to see it! I hv been looking for one for so long now.. but no luck..

After gaping at him for sometime.. I realised that he sure is some God-sent angel,, and I should ask him where he got the shirt from!
So here he was seriously reading Douglas Adams..and I pinged him and asked the million dollar question!
He was sweet.. Told me he had gotten it from Brigade road.. and when I insisted tht he must tell me the exact shop, for some strange reason his friend burst out laughing! duh!!
He turned around to look at his friend.. who tried to control his laughter.. btu was unable to do so! So this calvin hobbes shirt guy also joined him.. I was like - what the heck is goin on!!?
But the entire situation was such.. tht even I started laughing.. and we all had a good time for atleast 5 min..! :)

It was a funny situation.. and tht chap was so cute! :)
Finally he told me the shop and all and I thanked him, for all the entertainment and the information!
As I turned around to go.. to my freakin surprise, (call it horrible surprise!) he uttered - "sheri sheri..oru prasnavum illa" (which is malyalam!!) Bloody! All this while he was talking in English.. and he didnt obviously believe in leaving a good impression, which is why he HAD to crap in mal! I was like - duhh!!! :D

Sigh! Whats come to this world!! :)

2006-01-18T22:09:00.000+07:00

Going to stay in the 'Art of Living' ashram for the weekend.
So friday-saturday-sunday - total chillax!

Am I excited or what!! :) :)

Life rox! :)

2006-01-17T11:19:00.000+07:00

Oh man! yesterday was such an awesome day!!
In the morning, I woke up feeling good... jumped around a bit.. came to office.. and whoa! I see that Dileep has come over! (He works in IBM US,and is in India for a month!). He is one helluva cute chap alright! We kept on talking.. talking..talking !

Then after almost a month or something. I logged into Yahoo Messenger.. And Good lords!! I met Mekhla online!!! Alright, now Mekhla is this childhood friend of mine.. and we have been bessssst friends ever since we were in Juniour KG.. ie, for some 20 years now!! In school, we were like the glue-stick-friend-couple! :)
So I chatted with her for some 2 hours! I was soooo happy that its beyond explanation! So I wont even try! :)

Then all of us at office decided to take Dileep to IndiJoes for lunch.. which meant a clean escape from office for 2-3 good hours!
Ah.. so we are all sitting there.. and having lunch.. and I look up and WHOA!! Who's this!! And I see Kaushik and Roshith right infront of me!!
Kau was to come from Hyd this morning.. but I wasnt sure if he had come already!
And he was like- "Damn! We were coming to yer office right after lunch!!"
Man!! I was soooo excited to see him, we just leaped across the room and hugged! :) :)
Had met him last when I'd gone to Hyd..

Coolax! So after finishing ma lunch.. I joined Kau and all..We sat around and yapped yapped yapped! :D

Good fun!

Then, I come back.. and we again had a gossiping session with Dileep, Pritish and all..
Dint feel like working at all.... :)
While talking.. I was flipping through the pages of the calendar.. and calculatin that I've not been home for over an year now! And I generally opened the Air Deccan site.. and tada! I planned a cool trip.. and booked all tix right away.. for April... From Blore-Mumbai -Stay for 4 days, and meet Mekhla.. Then Mumbai- Delhi - Stay for 3 days - Meet Kinshuk.. Then Delhi- Kanpur - yuhoo! home sweet home :)
Then Kanpur-Delhi -Stay for 1 day - meet relatives; and Delhi-Blore! How cool is that!
Full 3 weeks break!! :)
Its like one dream-come-true for me :)

Yippee Yippee.. I jumped around the whole office and told everyone that I was goin home.. and my manager teased me saying, that since my absence meant 'no disturbance' and hence 'more work', I could happily go! :)

So generally it was all happy happy.. fun fun.. all the way!

and then I reach home at 8.30.. and Shalini and me are cooking..and talking.. and all that.. when Ankit calls! And he is like.. Hey! Lets catch the 10pm show of Bluff Master!
But we get late.. and Ankit n Shivku come only by 9.45! And so we race down from Domlur to Forum in exactly 5min 29 seconds!! Tht was quite something!!!
But no tix!!! So we booked it for the next day.. and went to Corner House instead..
Then sat there till late night,, and yackety-yaked again!!

#Whoever says life sux.. surely doesnt hv friends! ;-)

bckgrnd - All American Rejects - 'Dirty little secret'
/me-